If It Kills Me
by ktmarie
Summary: Bella and Edward have been best friends for years. When Edward comes back from a month long trip, everything between them suddenly starts to change. Rated M just to be safe. A/H. :
1. Chapter 1

**_Disclaimer: _I own a lovely old white volvo named Casper :)  
****but sadly, I do not own twilight :(**

**A/N: hello everyone! this is my first fanfic, and im really nervous about it! i hope everyone likes it! I'll prolly have a song for each chapter. Sort of like, my inspiration, or just a song i was listening to while i wrote it. Anyways, read on, and then tell me how you like it!**

**If It Kills Me - Jason Mraz **

Hello, tell me you know  
Yeah, you figured me out  
Something gave it away  
And it would be such a beautiful moment  
To see the look on your face  
To know that I know that you know now

And baby that's a case of my wishful thinking  
You know nothing  
Cause you and I  
Why, we go carrying on for hours, on and  
We get along much better  
Than you and your boyfriend

Well all I really wanna do is love you  
A kind much closer than friends use  
But I still can't say it after all we've been through  
And all I really want from you is to feel me  
As the feeling inside keeps building  
And I will find a way to you if it kills me  
If it kills me

Well how long, can I go on like this,  
Wishing to kiss you,  
Before I rightly explode?  
This double life I lead isn't healthy for me  
In fact it makes me nervous  
If I get caught I could be risking it all

Baby there's a lot that I miss  
In case I'm wrong

Well all I really wanna do is love you  
A kind much closer than friends use  
But I still can't say it after all we've been through  
And all I really want from you is to feel me  
As the feeling inside keeps building  
And I will find a way to you if it kills me  
If it kills me

If I should be so bold  
I'd ask you to hold my heart in your hand  
Tell you from the start how I've longed to be your man  
But I never said I would  
I guess I'm gonna miss my chance again

All I really wanna do is love you  
A kind much closer than friends use  
But I still can't say it after all we've been through  
And all I really want from you is to feel me  
As the feeling inside keeps building  
And I will find a way to you if it kills me  
If it kills me  
If it kills me

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**BPOV**

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP….

5:13am.

_UGHHHHHH._

_I hate life. _

_I hate mornings._

_I hate life in the mornings._

_Today is going to suck._

_OK, think happy things. Things that will make me _want_ to get up._

_Alice and the boyfriend are shopping all morning. That could be looked at as a good thing. At least she's out of _my _hair all day. _

_Me and Edward are going job hunting. Definitely a bad thing._

_but for us to go job hunting...he has to come home today._

_EDWARD'S FLYING IN TODAY!! Yes!_

_Definitely a good thing. And I'm supposed to pick him up from the airport in…_

_47 minutes._

_HA! Crap, crap, crap…_

I jumped out of bed and ran around my small bedroom looking for clean clothes and brushing my teeth furiously at the same time. Breakfast would have to wait. The airport was thirty minutes away and I could not be late!

I threw on a navy blue t-shirt, my favorite worn in blue jeans, and my old tennis shoes that were falling apart.

I looked gorgeous... _Yeah Right. _

My hair was still a mess from having slept on it without being washed and I didn't have time to put makeup on, but oh well. Edward wouldn't care. He never did. Grabbing my wallet and keys, I walked outside and locked the door to mine and Alice's apartment. It was so great to have our own place. We shared a dorm our freshman year of college, but dorms are tiny, and we figured an apartment would be more functional. As luck would have it, the apartment complex Edward's brother and his fiancé lived in had two openings on the floor above them, so me and Alice, and Edward and his other brother were able to take the two apartments so we could all live closer together.

As I turned the key in the ignition to my old, beat-up red truck, I felt the engine turn over and rumble to life. Edward absolutely _hated_ my truck, so I figured I would take advantage of this opportunity to drive him around in it. This would drive him crazy, especially since his Volvo is parked right beside my truck and he gave me the keys to it before he left. I turned up the volume on the radio and settled in for the drive to the airport.

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Edward Cullen and I have been best friends for five or six years now. We met the first day of our freshman year at Forks High School. I was terrified because I didn't know anyone, and I was really shy at the time. Of course, because I am so extremely clumsy, I spilled chili all over the table I was sitting alone at. Edward saw me and was nice enough to help me clean it up. He sat with me, and told me he was also extremely nervous and didn't know anyone besides his brothers. We both had biology after lunch, so we walked to class together. We've been inseparable ever since.

Of course, I can't forget all our other friends. For starters there are Edward's brothers, Jasper and Emmett. Jasper is very laid back and calm, and we have always gotten along great. He's the mysterious, musical, artsy type, and he tends to make people feel good just by his "everything's gonna be alright" attitude. Jasper and Edward are twins, so they've also always been extremely close also. Emmett is two years older than Edward and Jasper. All through high school he was the "popular" one out of all of us. He was quarterback of the football team, star of the baseball team, mad great grades, threw the best parties, and was involved in every club there was. He's also engaged to Rosalie Hale.

Rosalie is another one of my best friends. She can totally be a handful some times, but I know she means well and I just have to keep that in mind. She was definitely the popular girl at school, being the head cheerleader and drop dead gorgeous and all. She had beautiful wavy blonde hair, a perfect figure, and the confidence to carry it all well. But the thing about it was, she knew she was gorgeous and popular, and made sure everyone else knew it too. That can be very intimidating at times, but once you get to know her, she is just a kind, caring big sister type who's a little rough around the edges.

Rosalie and Emmett have been dating ever since that first day of school that we all met each other. Emmett saw her in PE that day, dropped some completely ridiculous line about her falling from heaven or something, and somehow she fell completely head over heels for him. They've been together ever since. Last year, when they were both juniors in college, Emmett proposed. He did it totally randomly and casually over breakfast one morning, without all the dramatic, expected stuff. It was perfect, and she said she wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

Last, but not least, we have Alice. She is my best girlfriend, and we are rarely ever apart. Alice is very petit and pretty. She has short, choppy black hair that she keeps styled wildly. She has wide eyes and a bright smile and I swear she could take on the world. She and Jasper have been together for almost as long as Rosalie and Emmett. It's strange, because they couldn't be more opposite. Alice is short with dark hair and dark features. Jasper is tall, lean, and blonde with blue eyes. He is also extremely laid back and relaxed, while Alice is the most energetic person I know. I guess opposites attract though, and I know they are in love.

And now we're back to Edward. We have been absolute best friends since day one. I have rarely ever done anything without Edward. We toughed it through high school together, went to prom together, applied for jobs and colleges together, the works. And for the past month he has been off in New York somewhere, playing the piano and having a great time without me.

He sucks.

This is the longest we've ever been apart since we met, and it is killing me!

I arrived at the airport a few minutes early, parked my car, and headed for the entrance.

I hurried inside and quickly checked the boards to find which gate he was flying in to. Realizing his plane was about twenty minutes behind, I walked up to the little café on the second floor to get us each a bagel and coffee. After that, I headed to the gate and waited. It was the longest fifteen minutes of my life. I fidgeted with the bag of bagels in my lap, sipped my coffee repeatedly, and constantly checked the time on my phone.

Finally the plane landed. I waited as patiently as I could for him to get off the plane. One person walked out. Then another.

Three.

Four.

Five...

_Okay, Edward. Hurry up please! _We spotted each other at about the same time, that crooked smile I loved breaking out on his face as he picked up his pace.

His messy bronze hair was perfect as usual, and he was wearing some random band tee that I'm sure he picked up in New York, his favorite blue jeans, leather flip-flops, and the Ray Bans I bought him for Christmas last year. I took off running and met him halfway. He dropped his bags right before I jumped on him, hugging him so tightly that he probably couldn't breathe.

"Mmm, Isabella Swan, it's so good to be back. You would not believe how much I've m missed you," he said into my hair.

"I missed you too! Did you have fun? What was New York like? Where are the pictures? What did you buy me?"

He chuckled. "Bella, I talked to you nearly every day, so you know the answers to like, all of those questions. You're paying my phone bill, by the way." he said as he let go of me.

"You called _me_ more than half of those times, if I recall correctly, so you will be paying your own cell phone bill, Edward." I said.

"Ha. We'll see."

I squeezed him again before I let go, and he laughed at my enthusiasm. He took his bagel and coffee, and I looped my arm through his as we walked to the baggage claims.

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"UGH, Bella I hate your truck," Edward groaned as he turned up the radio and laid his head back against the headrest. He says that at least twice every time we ride in it.

"Get over it. You know after we get back to the apartments my truck will just be sitting in the parking lot all the time so just let me enjoy this."

He just rolled his eyes and started changing radio stations with a smirk on his face. Suddenly he stopped and turned his head toward me.

"Bella, would you mind too terribly much if we go to the mall or someplace and just hang out for a while? I miss hanging out with you."

I was ecstatic.

"Sure, why not. We don't have anything to do till this afternoon, so lets just hang out for a couple hours."

He nodded his head and then started belting out the lyrics to the Celine Deon love ballad that was playing, making me laugh uncontrollably all the way to the mall.

An hour later, we were sitting on a bench in the food court, laughing at some woman's ridiculous clothes and finishing the last of our giant cookie slices. Edward suddenly turned serious.

"Bella, that man over there has been blatantly staring at you for like ten minutes," he said, looking straight in front of us. "He looks old enough to be your father and it is disturbing me."

Sure enough, sitting two tables in front of us, there was a middle aged man "blatantly staring," as Edward had said. I smirked and turned to catch his eye. He winked at me and then turned back to face the guy, reaching his arms over his head like he was stretching. When he came out of the stretch, he let his hand fall on my knee. He slowly drug his hand upwards, stopping about halfway up my leg before turning his face into my neck.

"Tell me when he stops looking," he half laughed, half whispered against my skin.

This was hilarious. We had done this little number countless times in high school to get various people to leave us alone, but we hadn't done it since we moved here.

Then next part of the game came into play. He started kissing my neck and right under my ear. Suddenly my stomach dropped, my heart stopped, and I froze.

_WOAH._

What's going on? This is Edward. We've done this countless times in the past, and it never had an effect on me before.

_But wow. I mean he's kinda good at this…_

What am I thinking?! He's my best friend! It's got to be because I haven't seen him in so long. That's it. Nothing at all to worry about.

_But geez. I wonder where he learned to kiss like this.._

No. I can't do this.

"Uh….Edward…?" I managed to get out.

"Yes, Isabella?" he said into my ear.

"He's, um, the creepy man just walked away."

WHEW. Thank God. I found my voice.

Immediately Edward dropped his hand and started laughing hysterically.

"That was hilarious! We haven't done that in years! Did you see the guy's face?! Priceless."

I cracked a smile, but I couldn't laugh.

Nothing was funny about what just happened.

I don't think he even realized..

_That should be a good thing, Bella. Get a grip!_

"…BELLA!" Edward said loudly, waving his hand in front of my face.

_Oops._

"You okay?" He looked genuinely concerned.

"Oh…yeah. I'm just tired. You ready to head back?"

_I seriously need to talk to Alice right now._

"Sure. I'll drive. You can sleep. Thanks for picking me up so early, my Bella," he said, hugging me close to him.

Okay, He _really_ needs to turn down the Edward a little bit today. He has always called me things like that and he is known for his charm, but _never_ has it had an effect of me.

I fell asleep almost immediately after we got in the car and slept the whole way home.

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**EPOV**

Thank God, she's asleep.

I breathed a sigh of relief.

I don't know what just happened at the mall. We were sitting there enjoying our morning when I noticed that sick pervert that just kept _ogling_ her like she was something to eat. So I did the juvenile thing and played our little "jealousy game" we used to play in high school. Just an old joke, right? But when I started to kiss her…

"Ughh…" I groaned. What is wrong with me? This is Bella! My best friend since I could remember.

I ran my hand through my hair as I looked over at her sleeping and sighed. _She is so beautiful_…of course I'd always known she was remarkably pretty, and sometimes I had wondered why such a pretty girl would choose to constantly be around me, when I'm sure she could do better. I had just never taken the time to really appreciate how _gorgeous_ she is.

_That's because you're not supposed to think she's gorgeous, Edward. She's Bella. _

What had this month of not seeing her done to me?

I sighed again and turned back to the road, trying to get it together before we got back to the apartments.

IF we ever _made_ it back to the apartments in this sorry excuse for a truck...

I cleared my head by listening to some of the classical piano music I kept on my iPod. Emmett constantly made fun of me for my taste in music when we were growing up, but he just doesn't understand. Music to me is like football to him. Jasper and Bella understand though, so I guess two out of three isn't too terrible. Rosolie on the other hand... she's just Rosalie. I don't particularly care what she thinks.

By the time we got back to the apartments, it was just after ten in the morning. I leaned over to wake Bella up, but then I thought better of it. She looked so peaceful sleeping. So I went around to her side and carefully picked her up, carrying her to the elevator, and then to her apartment door. Of course her door was unlocked. I _told_ her to stop doing that. It's dangerous. I carried her into her room and pulled her shoes off before I laid her down in bed and covered her up. Now to find something to do until she wakes up…

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**BPOV**

I woke up in my bed to the wonderful smell of pepperoni pizza. I raked my hands through my still messy hair, walking out of my bedroom towards the smell. Edward was standing in my kitchen, bent over the oven with his back turned to me, pulling the heavenly pepperoni pizza out. Edward is an _amazing_ cook. I have missed that quality a lot lately, since Alice and I both have some trouble in the cooking department.

He turned around and smiled crookedly, my smile, when he heard me come in.

"Good morning, sunshine," he said cheerfully, mocking my grogginess, I'm sure.

"What time is it," I half croaked. Ha. I am _not_ a fun person to be around when I wake up.

"It's 1:28 in the afternoon, Bella. You slept for like, three hours. But since you got up so early to pick me up I suppose you are forgiven," he smirked, and then kissed my hair.

_Why, if he's always done things like that, does it suddenly feel so different?_

I felt unbelievably awkward all of a sudden.

"Um, well, anyways, I made us some pizza to show my appreciation, but Alice just texted me and they're back from wherever they went and Jasper needs my help with something, so I've got to go," he said quickly as he shifted uncomfortably.

Great, my discomfort made him uneasy too.

"Uh, okay," was the most intelligent thing I could say.

He turned for the door, running his hand through his hair, which he only does when he is stressed out. What is up with him?

He got to the door before he suddenly turned around.

"Oh. Yeah. I'll be back in an hour to pick you up for our job hunting trip," he smiled grimly and then winked. Neither of us wanted to get a job, but I had depleted the funds my parents sent me, and even though his parents would send him as much money as he needed, he has always liked to provide for himself as much as possible.

I nodded my head to show him that I heard him, still feeling too awkward to say much.

I watched him leave, running his hand through his hair again, and then I sat down to my pizza and began lightly banging my head on the table, waiting for Alice to come through the door and listen to my problems.

I am seriously screwed up.

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**So?? did you like it?? or was it a total flop? please review and let me know!!! :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of Stephenie Meyer's awesome characters :(**

**A/N: Hello! Sorry it's been so long! my life is crazy busy right now!! But my best friend, Embry's Babe11, (go read her fanfic. its great.)is going to beta my story so maybe with her helping me I'll get chapters out faster! The song for this chapter is Love Drunk by Boys Like Girls. Hope you like it!**

**Chapter 2: Love Drunk**

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****

BPOV

"What's wrong with you?" Alice asked as she walked through the door with arms full of shopping bags. She had this completely thrilled, glowing look she always gets when she's near anything with designer labels. I ignored her. She walked back into her bedroom to put her things away, seemingly unscathed by my bad mood. The more I thought about my current situation with Edward, the more confused I felt. I was debated on whether or not to let Alice in on my problems, but quickly told myself that I would not tell her – not yet at least. She always takes everything to the maximum, and I wasn't ready for her yet.

"Oh, thank GOD Edward is back," Alice said loudly from the other room. "I was getting so sick of ramen noodles!"

_I guess she smelled the pizza. Lord knows Alice has a nose on her. _

She came in the room a moment later, got a plate down and scooped two slices of pizza onto her plate.

"So what's up?" She asked me as she sat down across the table from me. She looked up at me with a set, determined expression, and I could tell she wasn't going to give it up.

"I don't know. It's a long story, Alice."

_I was really trying to stay away from the topic._

_She gave me a puppy dog look and seemed to be carefully choosing her words._

"Well... I know it has something to do with Edward because he looks like someone just killed his puppy, too. So there's a start. "

"He does?"

_Crap. I've probably made him uncomfortable too. That's just what I needed right now. _

_Alice ignored me and kept up with her pretense._

_Alice knew how I felt. Talking about how I feel has always been a hard thing for me to do. Growing up, I never__ had many friends. My mother was kind of spacey – she's never been quite all there, if you know what I mean. My parents divorced when I was young, about 7 or 8, and I lived with her until high school. I often felt like I was raising her instead if the other way around. I went to live with my father in Forks, Washington the summer before ninth grade. He works most of the time, so I could never really talk to him either. _

_Then in high school, when I started hanging out with friends, it was usually Edward. Not to say we don't ever talk about how we feel, because we do. Just not in the girly, gushy, gossipy way that girls do, you know? There's a huge difference in talking to Edward about my feelings and talking to Alice about them. __Alice always took the long way around to understand me, mainly because she didn't have any problems with expressing herself. Edward was somewhat of a kindred spirit – he was a tortured soul just like I was. But, on the other hand, Alice was a girl, and sometimes…I just had to take the plunge and spill my guts to her. _

"Well…. me and Edward were at the mall, and this creep was checkin me out, so we did that stupid little 'make people jealous' thing we did all the time in high school. But this time was different. This time I think I felt something." I said the last part softly, hoping she would just move on and forget about it. This was a bad idea.

"Ew, Bella. If he was feeling you up or something_ I_ don't wanna hear about it," Alice said, choking back a laugh.

"No, Alice, I mean I _felt_ something. Like, you know…_something._ Feelings. " I stared down at the table and started picking at my pizza. When Alice didn't speak for several seconds, I glanced up. Her eyes were wide, and she dropped the slice of pizza she was holding back onto her plate.

"Seriously?" She asked me as our eyes met. I could see the little wheels turning in her mind, probably already picking out the colors of my bridesmaid's dresses. She's always thought this would happen.

"Well…yeah. But I don't know. Maybe it's just a result of him being gone for so long. That's what I think it is. That's got to be it. It's a natural result of not seeing him for a long period of time." At this point, I pretty much had _myself_ convinced that this was the truth, and I was feeling much better.

Alice just stared at me.

_Oh crap…she just picked out the ice sculpture. This wedding in her head is oh-so-obvious to me. Crap. Double, no wait, triple crap. _

"Bella, this is a big deal. You can't just brush this one off, sweetie. I'm serious." Alice said. Why didn't she understand that this just wasn't something that we needed to worry about? I just needed to talk through it. And now I had, so we didn't need to stress over it any more.

"No, it's not." I jumped up from the table and put my plate in the sink before I headed toward me room. "Like I said, it was just a reaction. Nothing's going on. Thanks for listening! Now I've got to get ready to go job hunting with Edward. I'll be in my room if you need me!" I felt totally better now.

Alice just rolled her eyes and ate another bite of her pizza as I hurried off to my bedroom. I quickly took a shower, wishing I had more time to enjoy how wonderful it felt. I changed into clothes that were dressy yet simple – me. I put on only the basic makeup, dried my hair, and threw it up in an elegant bun. The shoes I chose were just my black flats. I would kill myself in anything with heels.

When I was ready, I sat down on the couch to wait for Edward to get there. I was so excited to be with him again that it didn't even matter that we were doing something as boring as job hunting.

Ten minutes later, Edward came in the door. He never knocks anymore.

"You're late." I said as he walked in. He's hardly ever late, so he hates when I say something when he is late. Over the years it had kind of gotten to be a bit of an inside joke, just one of those that he didn't think was very funny, yet I thought was simply hilarious.

"Bella! Five minutes, that's it. Emmett and Jasper were playing some stupid game and I was trying to break it up. So get over it and get out the door. And by the way, if you were joking-it wasn't funny," He said. He was trying to sound irritated but he was smirking. He only _thought_ he was hiding it. This trip should be fun.

"Edward. For the last time, I am NOT going to be a mechanic! I don't know the first thing about cars!" I yelled at Edward. Both of us could hardly talk, we were laughing so hard.

We had been driving around for two hours now. Three jobs had been applied for before we stopped being serious. First we both applied at a music store downtown. After that, one of us was double dog dared to apply at the nasty local lingerie store, and one of us applied. And then one of us was awarded fifty bucks for our bravery.

And besides, if the man _has_ fifty dollars to just shell out for a stupid bet, I'm doubting he really needs a job anyways.

"I give up. Can we just go out to eat please?" Edward said.

"YES. I hate job hunting," I said as I kicked off my shoes and let my hair down.

"Okay. It's my turn to pick the restaurant, and I want to try the new foreign place down by the campus."

"How do you even know about that? You've been on the other side of the country for a month!"

"I drove home earlier, that's how." He said. He always makes me feel so stupid!

"Fine, but you have to pay too."

"What am I gonna do with you?" he said, sighing and rolling his eyes.

I just smiled.

The restaurant was a very strange, Middle Eastern style restaurant where you had to sit on the floor on a cot and eat all these funky things that neither of us could pronounce. We spent the whole time laughing and catching up. This was what I had missed so much during the month he'd been gone. We get along so well, and I'm more comfortable around him than anyone else in my life. I talk to him about things I can't even talk to Alice about. There are just some ways in which a guy friend is so much better than a girl friend. He sticks up for me, protects me, competes with me, listens to me, and jokes around with me.

Edward even cried with me one time when I was particularly upset about my parents being divorced. We were sophomores in high school, and I was just beginning to understand how greatly the divorce had affected me. I called Edward, and he drove over to my house. Since Charlie (my dad) wasn't home, he decided I could just come home with him. We sat in his bedroom floor, listening to music and talking about memories from the "good ole days" when we were kids and how much things had changed for us. Somewhere in the conversation I kind of lost it. He took one look at me, laid my head on his shoulder and started humming a tune I have grown to love over the years. I felt so stupid sitting there in his floor crying my eyes out, until I felt a single tear slip down my forehead. Edward was crying with me. He didn't say anything; he just wrapped his arm around me tighter, and held me there for almost half an hour. That moment made me respect him and love him more than any other moment in the six years we have been friends.

By the time we got back to the apartments, it was late and I was exhausted. Edward walked me to my apartment, kissed me on top of the head, and then ruffled my hair as I walked through the door. Today was a great day despite the emotional roller coaster I'd been on, and I couldn't wait for tomorrow. Last year was sort of a drag. Because it was freshman year, everything was very hectic. The six of us didn't get much time to just be friends. But I could already tell that this year would be totally different. Big changes were coming, great things were in store, and I couldn't wait.

**EPOV**

Dinner with Bella was wonderful. We honestly did try to find jobs, but it's not actually an urgent need for me to get a job yet, and Bella knows I'll take care of her until she gets one, so I don't think either of us was too concerned about it.

As I lay in bed that night, I just couldn't shake the feelings I'd been having all day. Bella was so beautiful, and I couldn't understand why I had never noticed before. It has been right in front of my eyes the whole time.

I mean, we are perfect for each other. We complete each other. She's everything I'm not, and I love her so much. And it's not like those words are foreign for us. We've told each other that we love each other nearly every day since we met, and it's the truth. I love her. And I'm absolutely sure she loves me. She just doesn't love me in _that_ way.

Come on Edward, pull yourself together. Bella needs a man that she doesn't already see as a brother, and that's how she will always see me. But I'll settle.

These strange screwed up feelings I'm having are not going to break our friendship. I'll either get over it after a few days just like every other "fling" I've had, or I won't, and I'll just have to work through it.

Either way, as long as Bella's happy, I'll be happy, and that's good enough for now.

I hummed her lullaby softly, the one I had been humming for her for years, as I quickly drifted off to sleep.

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**BPOV**

The next day was the first day of classes. _Bummer!_

I was really not looking forward to that at all. In my opinion, I had been in school for enough years. It was time to get out in the real world! Luckily for me though, either Alice, Jasper, or Edward are in every single one of my classes.

My first class was at 8:30 in the morning. I had basic history with Jasper, and I was sure it was going to be an easy class. I threw on some oversized sweat pants and a t-shirt and threw my hair up before heading out the door. No need to dress up; no one to impress. Jasper was leaning against the wall outside my apartment scrolling through his iPod with his hood up and sunglasses on. He is most definitely not a morning person.

"Bella, you're making us late for our first day of class. You drive. I have a headache." He was frowning.

_Nice to see you too, sunshine. How did you sleep?_

"Whatever. What's _your_ problem? Brighten up; it's the first day of school. You know what? I don't wanna drive. It's beautiful out here and our class is just a few buildings away. Let's just walk." I said.

He turned around and gave me a horrid look, and that's when I really got a good look at him. He was wearing light sunglasses, so I could see his bloodshot eyes. His hair looked like it hadn't been brushed, and he had a wincey type of look on his face.

_You have __**got**__ to be kidding me._

"Oh great, you're hung over! That's just fabulous Jazz. The first day of school? Really?" I said as I began walking toward class.

He scowled, but fell into step behind me.

"I cannot believe you thought it was a good idea to get _drunk_ before our first day of classes. What the heck were you thinking?" I asked him, irritated.

He stopped walking. "Bella, please. I heard it from Alice and Edward all morning. Get over it. I never do this. Emmett's idiot self talked me into it and I know it was a bad idea. I feel like crap. So just get off my back." He then turned his iPod back on and continued walking. I just stood there and looked at him for a minute before I tried to catch up. He hadn't gotten drunk in a while, and I was worried that something was up.

"Sorry, this just surprises me. I'll try to be nicer," I said as I caught back up with him. He just nodded his head once and kept scrolling through songs. When we got into class, I started to walk towards the front of the room. Before I could get too far however, Jasper caught me by the back of the shirt and dragged me back to the very back row of the amphitheater-style room. As I got out my laptop and prepared for class, Jasper threw his hood up and laid his head down.

"Email your notes to me," He said through his hood.

I rolled my eyes. I can't believe he is doing this on the first day of school.

Throughout the session I had to wake Jasper up twice because he was snoring. As soon as the professor dismissed class, I herded Jasper out of there and headed for the campus coffee shop. I made him sit down, and then ordered us each a latte. That should wake him up a little bit. He immediately guzzled half of it down when I gave it to him.

"So what's going on? You and Alice aren't fighting again, are you?" Last time they fought, it was not pretty. Being best friends with them makes it very hard when they fight, because they always want me to pick sides.

"You aren't gonna give it up, are you?! Nothing's going on. Emmett talked me into playing beer pong, and you know how bad I suck at that. But then your sissy little man friend made us stop. So then we bet on a football game, and I lost, and the stakes were that the loser had to go get drunk last night and then put up with Edward's wrath. So Emmett drove me to a bar, I drank a whole bunch more, and that's it. We got home at like, two this morning, Alice and Edward freaked, I'm hung-over, and today sucks. End of story."

"Oh," I said. "I just assumed you were trying to drink away your sorrows like you did last time you and Alice fought." He looked up at me from under his eye lashes with a menacing look. I forgot that we were forbidden to speak of that situation. None of us drink often or heavily, but if anyone is going to get drunk off their butt, it is going to be Jasper. I know it probably sounds totally out of character for him, but it is the truth. The last time he and Alice fought lasted about two weeks, and Jasper drank nonstop the entire time.

"Can we just go? I wanna sleep, and you have classes soon."

"Jazz…are you sure you don't wanna talk about whatever's really going on? I'm all ears."

"No you aren't silly, except for that one time we were both drunk and you flashed me…but those most defiantly are bigger than your ears." He said, laughing loudly. Then he winced because his loud laughing hurt his head, and it was my turn to laugh. "Ugh, besides, nothing is going on! Drop it."

I sighed as I stood up. He just exasperated me sometimes; he was such a typical guy. Jazz paid the tip, and we began walking back toward the apartments, so he could have his nap time and I could finally get some work done on my applications before my next class. But secretly I found myself looking forward to going back home…but only on the off-chance that Edward might be there.

When I got back to my apartment, Edward was sprawled out on my couch with my chips and my remote in his hands.

"You know, you do have your own recliner and tv just two doors to the right," I said, trying to act aggravated.

"Yes, but there is a _beer pong table_ in front of my tv. So I am using yours. Oh, yeah. Why the heck wasn't your door locked?" He said, sounding very aggravated about it all.

"Make him take the table down. I have to leave it unlocked in case _someone_ decides they need to come over and eat all my food," I said, as I walked over and took the chips from him. I walked across the room and sat down in the recliner Jasper had bought to keep in our apartment. Apparently the couch wasn't appropriate for football game-watching.

"Isabella, give me back the chips. Now." He didn't even crack a smile. He is very serious when it comes to food. We both are. And it is a problem that he is eating my chips. I had to look through Piggly-Wiggly, Winn-Dixie, and Publix before I finally found these specific chips.

I couldn't help the grin that broke out on my face. There was no way he was getting them back without a fight.

"Bella, I'm really comfortable. Don't make me get up."

I just reached in the bag, got a chip, and crunched it loudly, keeping a totally innocent face. Before I even realized what was happening, he had run across the room, pulled me out of the chair by my feet and grabbed the chips out of my hand. I sat there in the floor shocked as he calmly walked over to the couch, sprawled back out, and pressed play on the TV.

I sat there for a minute, irritated.

"Guess you'll just have to come and sit over here to get some," He said after a minute.

I sighed and walked over to him. He moved the cushions off the back of the couch so there would be room enough for both of us, and then scooted closer to the back to give me room. I laid down next to him, and then grabbed the chips before looking at the tv screen. This was the first time I really noticed what he was watching. It was _Made Of Honor,_ which is one of my favorite movies.

"Didn't we watch this in theaters?" I asked. It seemed like we did, but I couldn't really remember since we went to the movies every other weekend through high school.

"Yes. Yes we did. Because that was the time you spilled your effing coke all over my new shirt and jacket, and I missed the last half of the movie. And then I didn't talk to you for the whole rest of the night."

I instantly busted out laughing. That was a very funny night.

"And now you're making me miss it again. Gah, Bella, shut up." He said, trying not to laugh himself.

I quieted down anyways. I love this movie. But the farther and farther we got into it, the more awkward I felt. It was all too familiar. When Hannah went off to Ireland, leaving Tom behind, it reminded me of Edward being gone for a month, and how much I missed him. When she came back with a fiancé and Tom was deeply hurt, I couldn't help but think of me and Edward. _What if he found someone someday? Would I lose him to her? Would there still be a place for me in his life?_ And then came the part when Tom realized his feelings for Hannah. I became suddenly very aware of every place on me that was touching Edward, which was most of my right side because of the couch we were lying on.

I felt Edward shift uncomfortably beside me as he sighed.

_I wonder what he is thinking right now? He looks like he's just watching the movie. I hope I'm not like, really tense or anything because then he would be able to tell im uncomfortable. Is he uncomfortable? Oh God, I've gotta get out of here._

I yawned and stretched, and then innocently looked at the clock.

"Oh, wow. I didn't realize we've been laying here for so long. Me and Alice's next class starts in a while, so I gotta go," I said, standing up. He looked at me and nodded his head, and then turned back to the movie.

I grabbed my jacket and laptop, threw my shoes back on, and said bye to Edward.

I quickly shut the door behind me, and then turn around and slid down it. I can't believe how uncomfortable that got. What is wrong with me? At least Edward doesn't seem affected by my weirdness in any way. I put my head on my knees and took a deep breath, calming myself down.

That's when I heard the sobs.

"Alice?" She was sitting against Jasper and Edward's door, two doors down, the same way I was. I jumped up and ran over there. I had a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. Something was wrong.

"Alice, whats wrong? Are you okay?" I brushed my hand through her messed up hair, and then sat down beside her and put her head on my shoulder. She shook with sobs as I put my arms around her and held her tight.

"Alice. _What's going on?!" _I said again. I was seriously getting worried.

She looked up at me, and her eyes were bloodshot.

"Jasper's gone," She choked out, and then fell back on my shoulder, sobbing hard.

**SO. did you like it? Sorry for the cliffie. I know its only the second chapter, but hey. I just write what comes to me. lol.  
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Review please!!!! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER: I own a brand new pair of furr boots, but i do not own Twilight. :(**

**A/N: Hello! so sorry it took so long and so sorry it's short! but as soon as there are 5 reviews for this chapter, there will be a SUPAH long chapter 4!! :) Couldn't think of a song for this one. if you have any suggestions, tell me in a review, and it just might become the song for this chapter! lol special thanks to my beta and best friend in the world,, embry's babe11!! (btw, she's got a new story, My Hero, that you should probably check out :)**

**EPOV**

"He's still not picking up, Rose?" Emmett said from the couch where he was sitting holding Alice.

"Nope," Rose said, popping her "p". She was sitting at a barstool in her and Emmett's kitchen with the phone in one hand and a nail file in the other. When the princess is stressed out, she doesn't bite her nails; she files them.

We had each been taking turns trying to get Jasper the Dramatic to answer his phone for the past four hours. So far no one had come close to succeeding except for me. The second time I tried, Jasper answered the phone without talking, sighed, and then hung up. Jasper and I have always been extremely close, so I was actually pretty upset when he hung up on me. He was running out on me too, not just Alice, and it kinda hurt.

The only people that had left the apartment for any period of time were me and Bella, and we only left because we had a class.

No one exactly understood what was going on; Alice hadn't been okay enough to tell us what happened yet. From what we could understand, Jasper and Alice argued when they were shopping yesterday, and apparently it was a bad enough fight that Jasper felt he had to leave. Or maybe that lapse of judgment was a result of the alcohol.

The problem is that this is the second time Jasper has taken off, and last time he didn't answer any calls for nearly two weeks. It is very unnerving when a member of your family disappears for two weeks, and if it bothers me as bad as it does when he disappears, I can't imagine what it does to Alice.

"Alice, if you could just tell us what's wrong, maybe it will be easier for us to help," Emmett said gently. It's strange to see Emmett being so protective. Rose seems harsh but because of her, Emmett has grown up so much. He had been holding Alice for over an hour, gently stroking her arm and wiping away her tears.

"I'm so embarrassed about what we fought about, though," Alice said shakily.

"You know we won't judge or anything. We love you and we just want to help," Bella reasoned with her.

She still hesitated for a moment before continuing.

"Jasper overheard Emmett and Rose talking about their wedding and how much they couldn't wait to be together and how wonderful being married would be. So he casually brought up marriage yesterday while we were shopping."

"Really?! Wow, how exciting!" Bella said. She had been waiting for this for forever.

"Well, not quite. I kind of freaked. I don't know why; it was just unexpected. I mean you all know that I love Jasper more than my own life. I would do anything for him. But I'm not ready to be married! I can't even legally buy alcohol, for Pete's sake! When I think of marriage, I think housewives and smiling and babies and things like that. And that is just not at all appealing to me. But when I told Jasper all this, I was a little more worked up than I should have been, and he read way into it. I guess he felt like I was saying I didn't wanna marry him, and that's not the case at all."

"I shoulda known something was up when he was so willing to drink with me last night. I'm really sorry Alice. I shouldn't have let him get so drunk. That was screwed up. It's just that he's usually really funny when he's drunk, so I thought everyone would think it was funny." Emmett said.

I glared at him. He knows how un-funny I think it is when those dipsticks drink.

"Well, except for Edward. That was kind of another point of the drinking: making Edward mad. Which was totally stupid. I'm for real sorry," Emmett continued. I could tell he meant it. Emmett's not the kind of guy who apologizes easily. Usually you have to pry it out of him. It's been the cause of multiple fights between him and Rose.

"It's okay Emmett, it's really not your fault. Surely he'll be back. He came back last time, I just have to give him his space," Alice said. By the time she finished, she was breaking down again.

We all just sat there, feeling helpless. All of us hate when we are not together. It really does feel like a part of us is missing.

That's when Alice's phone rang. She started crying harder as she stood up.

"It's him," she whispered as she walked quickly into Emmett and Rose's room and shut the door.

"…I _know,_ Jasper, but that's not what I meant….no! You know I love you!....Oh, _God,_ you're being so dramatic….what? No! I'm not….I'm getting so sick of this crap…You're mad about _that?!_…yes! You act just _like_ him!....no, because I meant it!...do you really want to bring _that_ up right now?!...no _you_ get over it!"

Things had been going this way for half an hour now. Emmett sighed and turned up the TV some more.

"Well, I have a hair appointment, so I'll be back," Rose said, standing up from where she had still been sitting on a barstool.

"I'll drive you!" Emmett announced, jumping up and chunking the remote at me.

Both of them were out the door and down the road in about two point five. I almost wanted to laugh at the thought of Em at the place where Rose got her hair styled, if the situation hadn't been so awful, I probably would have texted him just to rag on him. It was freaking funny.

"You know what? We really shouldn't invade Alice's privacy like this," I said. I was getting sick of this, plus I just really wanted to justify an out.

"Yeah. I mean, I'm sure she wouldn't want us to hear all the details of their fight, so we should probably leave." Bella sounded ready to get out of here too, but neither of us made the move to get up, even thought we were slowly coming up with some really good reasons in our heads.

"I mean, we'll bring her back some supper," she added in after a minute. This completely justified leaving for both of us, and we were out the door in a matter of seconds.

"So what now?" Bella asked as she shut the door behind us.

I didn't really care what we did. Bella has a way of making everything exciting. I would do anything she wanted all day just to keep her happy. Her laughter is the best sound I've ever heard, and her smile is absolutely stunning. She likes to talk a lot sometimes, but it doesn't even matter because she is one of the most fascinating people on this earth. Everything she does is interesting to me.

_But I guess I am a bit biased. After all, I am her boyfrie –_

"Edward! Snap out of it!" Bella yelled in my face, giggling. She grabbed my arm and started walking down the hall.

_Wow. Her boyfriend, I am not. That was not a good train of thought I have got to work on my self control, if I am ever going to keep this friendship alive, I have got to stop thinking like this. But why should I? Most guys' thoughts are a lot worse than mine! Why shouldn't I think about her?_

She started skipping, making me almost fall over since her arm was still linked through mine.

_Because this is Bella. That's why. She deserves so much better…_

"Edward, seriously. You just almost ran into a wall. Come back down to earth," Bella said, a sarcastic grin on her pretty little face.

Suddenly an idea hit me. "I know what we can do! I still haven't given you your present from my trip! I completely forgot about it," I said, pulling her along to my apartment.

I unlocked my door and we stepped inside. Bella plopped down on the couch and started playing with my guitar while I searched through my luggage for her presents. The place was a mess because I had been gone for a month and, to be honest, Jasper is a total slob. I'm sure Alice is the only reason it looks _this_ decent.

"Okay, close your eyes," I told Bella, walking back into the living room. She squealed and clapped her hands over her eyes. I couldn't contain my smile. She was going to love this.

"Okay, present number one," I said, handing her a shopping bag. She clapped and grabbed the bag from me, keeping her eyes closed as she dug straight in to the bag. She opened her eyes and her jaw dropped.

_Ha._

"Edward! You do not _seriously_ think I'm going to wear this do you?" She said very sternly. She was holding a very small, very um, revealing shirt thing that said "I heart NY" across the chest. I tried to stay serious, but I couldn't hold in my laughter. Her face was priceless. She balled the thing up and threw it at me.

"Next," She said, trying very hard to act irritated, but I could tell she thought it was funny, too.

Now I handed her the real present. It was in a much smaller package, with nice wrapping and ribbons and bows around it. Her grin stretched across her face in anticipation. She had been nagging me constantly ever since I told her I bought her a present a couple weeks into my trip. She peeled back the wrapping paper and took the lid off the box. Her eyes grew huge, and I couldn't keep from smiling.

"Edward, you didn't!" she said very quietly, almost a whisper. In the box were two tickets to see Romeo and Juliet on Broadway, two airline tickets, and hotel room reservations. She had wanted to do this for forever, and I figured since I was in New York, why not make that a reality for her?

On top of all the jumping and screaming, she pretty much attacked me.

"This is so exciting! When do we go?!"

_We?_ I pried her off of me and reached for the tickets. She is not making this easy…

"Ah, check the date on the ticket. I'm not sure when it was. You know you don't have to take me with you just because I bought you the tickets. You can take Alice with you if that's what you prefer," I said, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Of course I'm taking you! It's over Thanksgiving break. We can go to New York and then head straight to Forks from there. Wait, do you not want to go?" She said all this very quickly, and went from excited, to serious, to upset all in two sentences.

"Of course I want to go," I said smiling. There was nothing I wanted more. A couple days alone with her in New York would be great. "I just wanted you to know you aren't obligated to take me."

"Well it's settled then. You're going with me. I have to go call Alice!" she said excitedly, running into my room to make her phone call.

I figured it would be a while, what with all of Alice's current idiot-boyfriend problems, so I decided to cook us some supper while I waited.

"Bella, Invite her over! I made fettuccini!" I yelled to her.

I would love nothing more than to spend the whole evening alone with Bella, but Alice needed a friend right now. The six of us have always been pretty good about being there for each other, especially me, Jasper, Bella and Alice.

I put the fettuccini on two plates and carried those and two drinks into the living room. Bella came out of my room, closing her cell phone and putting it in her back pocket.

"Alice can't come. Her talk with Jasper didn't go that great and she said she's going to bed."

"Then I guess it's just you and me," I said, feeling slightly eager.

We ate our fettuccini and talked for a while before we realized it was getting dark. I was sitting with one arm across the back of the couch and my legs crossed at the ankles in front of me, and Bella had been sitting beside me.

When our conversation hit a lull, Bella shifted positions, laying her head in my lap and stretching out long-ways across the couch. This started my emotions running all over again. It was crazy to me how things that used to be so routine, things that I'm sure she still saw as routine, were such a big deal to me now. Being close like this is not new to us. We sit like this all the time. For some reason, this time all I want to do is reach down and run my hands through her hair, was it not normal for a best friend to do that? I mean, I have before. Would this be any different for me? For her?

"Edward, I wanna talk to you about something," Bella said randomly, snapping me out of my daydreaming.

_I have got to stop doing that…_

"Okay, shoot," I said after a moment. It must be serious, because normally she just blurts out whatever is on her mind when she's with me. My stomach turned as I tried to go through scenarios of what it could be.

_Does she know about what I've admitted to myself? Have I been acting that strange? I thought that I've been doing well as far as hiding my feelings goes._

"Do you ever think about the future?" She asked me.

_That's a loaded question…_

"Sure, all the time. Why?" I answered.

"I don't know. I've just never really thought about it, but now for some reason it all seems so important and scary." Her voice kept getting quieter as she continued.

"I mean, I'm scared, Edward. The future is going to be so different from now. And I don't wanna lose you." The last part was nothing but a whisper that I'm sure she didn't intend for me to hear. I felt something wet on my leg. My Bella was crying. I immediately started blinking back my own tears. Her crying has always been the one thing that can break me. I don't know why. I'm not the kind of guy who easily cries, but when Bella is seriously upset about something, it's everything I can do to keep myself from bawling. Ever since the first time I saw her cry in my room during freshman year, her emotions are my emotions.

I pulled her up to me, holding her tight against my chest and stroking her beautiful hair like I had been craving to do this whole time.

"Why would you lose me?" I asked her. I didn't understand where this was coming from, or why she was so upset.

"You know, this friendship can't go on forever. One day you're gonna fall in love with someone and then there won't be room for me. I've always known that. It just seems like now that we're older, the moment is so much closer. I don't want you to leave me."

She was breaking my heart. On the one hand, I hated it that she felt that way, but on the other hand, how could she think that I would just abandon her like that? There would always be room for her in my life, and if the past several years haven't shown her that, then I am such a failure as a friend.

"Isabella, look at me," I said, pulling her face back so I could see her, tears threatening to spill out of my eyes. "There will always be room for you in my life. I will never just leave you hanging. I promise."

Then I pulled her back to my chest and held her as tight as I could. There were so many other things I wanted to say to her, so many ways I wanted to prove my promise.

Slowly I felt her arms wrap around me in return. That's when I felt the whole atmosphere in the room shift, just like it did earlier when we were watching TV. I was suddenly acutely aware of everything that was going on. The room was silent, except for the sound of the dishwasher running. There was a strange electricity between me and her. It was different from anything I'd ever felt, and I wanted more of it. She was so close…always so close. She was actually sitting in my lap with her arms wrapped around me. All I would have to do is bend my head down a couple inches to kiss her and prove exactly how sure I was that I wouldn't be abandoning her.

I ran my hand along her arm as soothingly as I could, trying to convince myself to _just kiss her._

"I have to go check on Alice," Bella said suddenly, straightening up and wiping her face of any stray tears. She didn't look at me as she quickly got her stuff together and hurried away. I sat there shell-shocked as I tried to figure out what exactly just happened. I wasn't sure if she felt the electricity I felt just now or not, but I don't see how she couldn't.

I lay back on the couch, thinking things through. There was really only one decision I needed to make. Things couldn't keep going the way they were going. Either I was going to have to try to make Bella see the potential we had as a couple, or I was going to have to completely make myself drop it. Which I was pretty sure was impossible.

There was a third option, but it hurt to even consider it. Maybe Bella was right. Maybe our friendship couldn't last forever. I remember my dad telling me years ago after the first time Bella came over for dinner that boys and girls couldn't be friends. He said that one of them would always start having feelings, and it would either make them or break them. That's how my parents got together actually. Best friends since they were little. But in my opinion, any relationship, even a friendship with Bella was better than no relationship at all.

I decided I would subtly start showing her how I feel in discreet, non-obvious ways. I don't think I will ever find the courage to tell her flat-out how I feel, but maybe she would get the idea.

**Like it?? review!! remember, 5 reviews, and there will be an extra long chapter 4!!**


	4. Chapter 4

**DISCLAIMER: I now own 1/7 of a really cool log fort/cabin/playhouse, but i do not own any fraction of Twilight :(**

**A/N: Yeah, I know i'm posting twice in one day. But oh well. I couldn't help myself. Hope you like! I don't have a song for this one either, so review and tell me what song i should use! **

**Also, reviews = teasers. Thanks to Embry's Babe11, my beta!!**

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BPOV

Sleep was hard to come by that night. I just kept thinking about how suddenly screwed up things had gotten. Jasper was gone, Alice had been nearly hysterical for hours now, and things were so great, yet so weird with Edward. I mean, I liked the new feelings, seeing Edward in a different light was wonderful, but I didn't want things to change for the worst…I couldn't bare life without him…ever.

I woke up at 2am Tuesday morning to the sound of my phone going off, signaling me that I had a text.

_Bella, I need to talk. –J_

Oh man. He better have a dang good reason for taking off, or this conversation is not going to go well, it was freaking two in the morning for one thing, and two he had done nothing but hurt my best friend so he better talk quick.

_Well then talk. –B_

It took him five whole minutes to text back.

_I don't think I can come back. -J_

What the HECK does he mean, can't come back?!

_What the HECK do you mean, can't come back?!? You better have a REAL good reason for this crap, Jasper. I mean it. Alice hasn't stopped crying since you left. Emmett had to hold her for like, 3 hours so she didn't completely fall apart! –B_

Ten minutes went by, and I just assumed I had ticked him off. Right as I was drifting back off to sleep, he replied.

_Call me. Please. –J_

I sighed as I hit speed dial number 4. He is my friend almost just as much as Alice is, I can't just not help him when he needs it. He picked up on the first ring.

"Jasper, I _swear –"_

"Look Bella, before you say anything, I'm sorry. And I'm gonna get off my chest what I need to say before you get to say anything, so just shut up for a minute."

_Okay, I guess he can talk first._

He sighed and then started.

"I swear I didn't do this because I was drunk, or because I'm just having another episode or something stupid like that. I just can't take it anymore. Everything about our group is so freakin perfect. As soon as you and Edward get in on – "

"Jasper, watch it."

"Sorry. Anyways, we are all just grouped off, living together in our perfect little bubble worlds, and you know how much I can't handle that crap. I've never been able to. But I've been trying _so hard_ for her. And I thought I was doing so well. I was even gonna ask her to marry me. I've been carrying around the ring for two weeks now. Man, it's huge. I wish you could see it. But when I brought up marriage and Alice shot it down so abruptly, I had to get outta there. For so long, I've thought that was exactly what she wanted. I've tried day and night the past couple of years to make everything perfect for her. But then finding out that's not what she wants just changed everything I thought I knew. You know what I mean?"

I thought about it.

"Um, no. Not exactly." I felt bad. I really was trying to follow him, but he was borderline hysterical, and I'm pretty sure he'd still been drinking.

"I just feel like…..like everything I thought I knew about her was wrong. By the way she stays so caught up in our little family; I figured she couldn't wait to start her own. So I've been going along with it, pretending like that's what I want too. But now it feels like the past couple of years have just been a lie. Maybe we don't really know anything about each other. I feel suffocated, Bella. I don't know what to do."

Wow. That's deep. I didn't realize he felt that way. I sighed. Alice is so gonna hate my guts for this…

"Are you asking for advice?"

He sighed with relief. "Yes. That is exactly what I want. You're about the most level-headed person I know. Besides my parents, but lets not get mommy and daddy involved, shall we?"

"Deal," I said, laughing lightly.

"Jasper, I hope you don't take my advice as the right or wrong thing to do. That's for you to decide on your own. But if I were in your situation, I would stay off by myself for a while; think things through. It seems to me like you and Alice will be fine. It looks like you both have the same views after all, you just didn't realize it. But if you're feeling suffocated around us, maybe you need a break. Whether you ask Alice to come with you or not, I think you need some down-time away from the rest of us. Not to say we won't miss you, because we definitely will. And we'll be here with open arms whenever you decide to come back."

"I think that's a good idea. I don't think Alice will be coming with me though. I need some serious alone time, just me and my music to heal me and help me figure things out. Thanks, Bella. I'll let you go now."

"Alright. But Jasper, do me a favor. At least stay in touch with her. Let her know you're alive every once in a while. You'll kill her if you don't."

"I will. I definitely couldn't go more than a day or two without hearing her voice, no matter how high pitched and squealy she gets. But I think, besides talking to her, I'll be turning my phone off."

"Okay. Love you. See you when you get back," I said quietly, trying to mask my disappointment. I was kind of hoping he wouldn't take my advice.

"Love you, Bella," He said quietly, and then the line went dead.

I sighed and threw my head back on the pillow.

_What have I just done? My family is going to be broken up for no telling how long. How can I hurt Alice like that? Plus, why did Jazz have to try to grow us all up so quickly. Maybe Alice didn't want to be married in college. Why did we have to fast-forward…all I wanted was to live now, and hold onto the present for as long as I could._

I had to remind myself that Jasper was the one that made the decision, and as his friend, I was just standing by his him.

I fell back into a dreamless sleep, dreading waking up and facing my now bleak-looking day.

A few hours later I felt my bed shift and a lot of sniffling. I pulled my best friend to me, wishing I could take away the pain I caused.

"He's not coming back," she said shakily, and then she collapsed into me, sobbing.

* * *

The next few days went by in much the same way. Alice would get up and trudge through the day, a shell of her former self. Jasper would call once a day and she would get up, run to the nearest bedroom and lock the door. Fifteen minutes later she would come back out, cuddle up to whoever was around at the time, and cry some more. We drug her to all her classes, made her eat, and tried to get her to participate in our once a week movie night and other activities.

For some reason, though, Jasper said something different than the normal I love you and miss you to Alice Friday afternoon. She came walking calmly out of her room, grabbed her jacket, and turned to face us.

"Yall need to get up and stop moping around. We're going to a party tonight at one of the frat houses. Girls, we're going shopping in ten minutes. Boys, you best do something to make yourselves look better, or you're not coming with us and we'll spend the evening dancing with sexy frat boys."

The queen is back, I see.

"Well, _they_ will dance with sexy frat boys," she said, pointing to where Rose and I were sitting together on the couch in Jazz and Edward's apartment. "I'm going to anyways."

And with that, she strutted her stuff right out the door.

Edward shot me a look. I sighed and stood up.

"Well isn't she just chipper and back to her normal self," Emmett said sarcastically. I think he was actually disappointed that she didn't come and cuddle with him. He's such a softie.

I wasn't sure if this was a good thing or a bad thing, considering the sudden shift in her mood.

"Good luck," Edward yelled as Rose and I walked outside. Emmett's booming laughter was the last thing I heard before I slammed the door and we ran to catch up with Alice.

* * *

"Alice, I feel ridiculous. Actually, I feel like a stupid little skanky high school girl," I said, dreading this evening with everything in me.

"Hey, I used to wear things just like this in high school, and I'm not a skank," Rose said, turning around to make a pouty face at us in the tightest, reddest, and most provocative…thing I have ever seen in my life. Alice and I busted out laughing.

"Oh, I'm sorry. You're absolutely right. You weren't just a skank in high school," I said between laughs.

Rose picked up the pillows off my bed and threw them at us. We had been in here for the better part of an hour trying to get into our…things Alice made us buy. Of course I was the only one that was uncomfortable, since Rose was apparently used to it and Alice was on the warpath for some reason.

"Girls! Stop goofing off. This is game time. Now remember, we want to stay away from our boys as much as we can. This is revenge. You hear me?" Alice was barking out orders like a drill sergeant. She was usually bossy, but I'd never seen her like this.

Rosalie shot me a look that said _WTF?!, _which is exactly what I was thinking.

"Alice, you do realize that we have nothing to get revenge for, and if you're looking to get revenge, Jasper's not gonna be there to see it. SO what exactly do you want us to do," Rosalie asked. I could tell she was trying to be sincere, and I think Alice knew that too. Tears started welling in her eyes.

"I don't know. I just…I just need to go to this party. I need to have a good time, and I need to drink," Alice said. I felt so bad for her. We had been trying to get her to tell us what was going on the whole time we were shopping, but she was putting up a front, pretending like she was okay.

With that, she straightened herself out, grabbed her keys, and barked out orders for us to follow her to pick up the boys.

Rosalie looked like a rock star walking down the hall. I don't know where she gets the confidence to wear dresses like this, if it can even be called a dress, more like a…loincloth, but the confidence is definitely something I am lacking.

My dress was dark blue, covered just below my butt, and was strapless. It clung tightly to my body, and didn't leave much to the imagination. Alice had straightened my hair until it was straighter than a board, and I had a ton of makeup on. On top of that, I had on the highest heels I think I've ever worn. This was going to be a difficult night.

I kept telling myself I just needed to let her get it out of her system, but now I was seriously regretting that. Rosalie and Alice were wearing matching red and black dresses, and they both looked great in them. I don't get how the same dress can look horrific on me, but stunning on them.

We got to the boys' apartment, and Alice knocked loudly. We could hear Edward's smooth voice and Emmett's laughter as they approached. When the door swung open though, the laughing abruptly stopped. Both of them were standing there with their mouths open. What pigs.

Emmett immediately picked Rosalie up and started making out with her. It took Edward a little bit longer to get himself together, but when he did he started right in to the big brother get up.

"Nope. We aren't going to any party," He said, walking back inside. Alice and I followed him, waiting for the drama to start.

"Not until all of you put some clothes on. Nope, no party. Dirty frat guys. Stupid party. Need a jacket." He was mumbling things to himself as he looked all over his room for one of my jackets. I kept one at his house since I was over here all the time. Alice sighed and then walked into Jasper's room; I suppose to find herself one.

"Ah! Found it," He said, throwing a white pea coat over my shoulders happily. Except it wasn't my white pea coat. Mine had pockets.

"Edward, whose coat is this?" I asked immediately.

He glanced back over at me, seemingly distracted. "What do you mean? It's yours." But as he said this, his head shot up and his face turned pale.

Just then Alice came out of Jasper's room, looking at Edward with a look I couldn't decipher.

"It's mine," she said walking over to me. "Oh wow, I haven't seen that thing in forever! How'd it get in there?" She said to herself, laughing it off.

But that was not her jacket. Or at least _I've _never seen it on her.

So whose jacket was it? My mind started reeling. Is he seeing somebody? Why the heck hadn't he told me? This is weird. I don't think I can be around him all night. I finally _looked_ at him for the first time tonight.

He was standing up against the wall in the living room, glancing around nervously and raking his hand through his hair repeatedly like someone was watching him or something. That aside, though, he actually looked nice. More than nice. He looked…good. Of course he looked good about 99% of the time. But he looked really good tonight, with his hair perfectly out of place, his new button down shirt, and his khakis.

But now that I know about his little girl friend, I'm going to ignore him tonight just like Alice wants me to. How could he not tell me that? It just seems like something you would tell your best friend. And why was Alice covering for him? I felt betrayed.

_Fine. If they want to keep their little secrets from me, I'll let them. But two can play this game._

"Whatever." I threw the jacket in his room and shut the door loudly before walking straight out the door, not even paying Edward the time of day. The others were already standing there waiting for us. Edward was of course right behind me, and when he came out, Emmett shot him a death glare.

_Does everyone but me know?!_

I abruptly started walking toward my truck.

"Bella, come on. You're not taking your truck. Ride with me. Please?" Edward said, chasing me. I ignored him, picking up my pace. Of course, picking up my pace made me trip over my heels, and I started going head-first straight for the pavement.

Right before I hit, I felt two familiar arms wrap around me. For a second, I wanted to forgive and forget – just go back to how we were earlier. But I couldn't if he was keeping things from me. We've never kept things from each other, not since ninth grade. I knew about every bad date, fight, grounding, speeding ticket, and doctor's appointment he'd had in the last six years. Or at least I thought I did until five minutes ago.

I realized he still hadn't let go of me.

"You don't have your truck keys, Isabella," He said quietly.

_Dang. _The others were already gone, and my keys were locked in my apartment. Looks like I'll have to ride with the liar.

He set me down on my feet and then walked beside me to his car. I had my arms crossed, and didn't look at him at all. Conversation on the way there was sparse, but I felt like I couldn't go all night without bringing it up.

"Who is she," I said in a monotone.

"Who is who?" He asked, glancing over at me. By the way he shifted in his seat, I could tell he knew exactly who I was talking about.

"You know what? I don't even care. I just don't get why you didn't tell me. We tell each other everything. Or at least I do," I was getting emotional. Why is this affecting me so much?

"I didn't tell you because it wasn't important. You didn't need to know," He said, raking his hand through his hair again.

That didn't even make sense.

"How could I not need to know, Edward? I need to know everything about you! I always have! Or at least I thought I did. I tell you everything! I don't get why I'm not important enough to you for you to tell! You obviously told everybody else." I was crying now. Good thing Alice only uses waterproof makeup.

He sighed. He still didn't even attempt to deny anything, nor did he attempt to explain himself. That just hurt me even more. What if it was bad? What if he had like, a whole other secret life? What if he was like, a father or something, and this skank was his baby daddy?

_Bella, stop jumping to conclusions._

"I want you to stay close to me tonight. These frat guys don't have any respect or decency," Edward said as he cut off the engine.

I wiped away my tears and looked straight at him.

"No. You should have thought about that. Tonight I am having fun, and you can't father me and keep me from it," I said. I knew it sounded totally immature, but oh well. I didn't care. With that, I got out of the car, raked my hand through my hair, and walked toward the frat house.

"You have _got _to be kidding me," I said to myself as we approached. For a college fraternity party, this was impressive. The massive house was decorated rather sophisticatedly.

I walked inside and there were people everywhere. I felt very exposed in my dress, considering that several guys were, in Edward's words, blatantly staring, but after a moment I decided that I didn't care. Tonight, I was going to let loose a little bit.

After doing a shot and talking to a few people I knew from my classes, I decided I wanted to dance. The only problem was I had nobody to dance with. That's when I saw Alice. She was all the way across the room, already on the dance floor. I walked straight over to her.

"Hey, Bella, this is James," She said, referring to the guy she was dancing with. "Aren't you gonna dance?"

"Um, yeah. I don't know where Edward went, though," I yelled over the music. I really felt kind of bad for stomping off like I did. I'm sure there's probably a perfectly good reason why he didn't tell me.

"Bella. He was being a jerk. Have some fun! You look incredible, I'm sure any guy will want to dance with you!" With that, she was gone, lost in the music, trying to tune out her problems by dancing with a stranger. I would honestly prefer to dance with Edward. I'm not big on hanging out with strangers.

I wondered back over to where drinks were being served, doing another shot and looking around at the party.

My phone went off, and I was surprised to see it was a text from Jasper.

_Where the HECK are you guys?_

Oh, he's gonna flip.

_At a party, Jasper. What do you want?_

What happened to turning your phone off, is what I really wanted to say. Last time I checked I'm not Alice, I don't have a pixie-type hair cut and I don't have uncanny shopping abilities. Whatever he did to make Alice act like this, I'm pretty sure I don't want to talk to him right now.

_Make Alice leave. Now. Who is she with??_

_Some dude named James. They're dancing. What did you do to her? She's been weird all day. She made us come 2 this stupid party._

That was gonna tick him off.

_She's WHAT?! I'll be there in half an hour. I can't do this anymore._

I turned my phone off. I didn't need this drama

"It's a shame such a gorgeous girl isn't out there dancing," a smooth, deep voice said from beside me in my ear.

"Is that an invitation?" Where did _that_ boost of confidence come from?

He grabbed my hand, and I got a shiver as I stood up and turned around. A very tall, beautiful guy with russet colored skin and dark, glossy hair. He smiled a wide, reassuring smile at me, giving me the once-over and leading my to the dance floor.

"I'm Jacob," he yelled over the music as we began to move.

"Bella," I said smiling. Then we got lost in the music. I don't usually do this, but I was having so much fun. Maybe it was the two shots, or maybe I'd just never realized how much fun dancing could be. Jacob was a great dancer, and he was extremely hot. We were dancing very close now, our bodies meshed together, and I was loving the attention. I wasn't used to getting this kind of attention from guys. His hands were all over me, and for once I didn't care. I just gave in to the feeling and let him take control. Just as he was leaning down to kiss me, which I had decided I wanted very badly. His hot breath was on my face, closer, closer…

And then I felt myself being yanked around, untangled from Jacob, and thrown over someone's shoulder.

_Has this guy lost his mind?_

"What the –"

"Bella just shut up. You are being so immature. I expected this from Alice. She's going through a lot. But I definitely didn't expect this from you."

This was definitely not Jacob.

"EDWARD! PUT ME DOWN!" I was infuriated. How dare he?

"What did I tell you about the frat guys?! He was trying to get in your pants! Or I guess in your case, your extremely short, revealing piece of fabric! This is absurd!"

"You're right, Edward! It is absurd! It's _absurd_ that you won't let me do anything! It's none of your business! I just wanted to have a good time, but you can't let me! What is your problem?" By now we were outside, and I started punching his back until he put me down.

"You know you didn't like that guy! You were just looking for a good time and so was he, and it was wrong." He said, fuming. I don't get why he is so extremely mad about this.

"Yes, Edward. Yes, I was just looking for a good time. It's a PARTY!" I yelled at him. We never fight like this. It was making my stomach knot up.

"You're drunk. We're going home," he said before picking me up again.

"I'm hardly drunk, and I am _perfectly_ capable of walking!" with that, I kicked him, right where it counts.

He immediately dropped me and started screaming obscenities. I adjusted my dress; _the thing wasn't made for this type of movement,_ and paraded off to go find Alice. When I walked back in the room, I saw two things almost simultaneously. First, I saw Jacob making out with some random little freshman. This didn't really bother me; it just proved Edward right, which sort of ticked me off.

The second thing I saw was Jasper in all his fuming glory punching James in the face as hard as he could, and then smiling at Alice before about four other guys, I'm guessing James' fraternity brothers, jumped on Jasper. Of course, Emmett jumped in on the action, causing Rosalie to start screaming at him.

By the time the whole ordeal was over, Jasper was beaten to a pulp, Emmett had cleared everyone off of him, Rosalie was repeatedly hitting Emmett, and Alice was all over Jasper. Edward walked in right at the end and, looking totally puzzled, just turned around and walked back out.

I sighed, and then turned around and followed him. He was sitting in his car down the street. As much as I hated to do it, the fight had in some totally weird way calmed me down, and I knew I needed to apologize.

I got in his car, and as soon as I was seated he threw it in drive and drove off. It was utterly silent for the whole two minutes we were riding, but when he parked and turned off the car, he made no move to get out. Instead he sighed and ran his hands threw his hair, leaning his chair back and opening his sunroof. We often did this when we needed to get away. It was like our hideout, even though we were out in the open.

I didn't know whether he wanted me to stay or not, but I figured it was probably a no. I reached to open my door.

"It was Tanya." He said quietly. I pulled my hand back, and turned around to look at him. That didn't add up. Tanya was the one steady girlfriend he'd had in high school, and she was a witch. As far as I had known, none of us had seen her since graduation.

He sighed again. "Can you please lay back? You're making me feel uncomfortable."

I slowly let my chair back, situating my dress so that I could lie back comfortably. I crossed my arms on my stomach, and looked out the sunroof.

There was something so calming about it. It was like a window to another world. No matter where you are, you can just lock your car doors and look at the stars. It had become a place where we talked, thought, listened to music, and on occasion, just sat and were there for each other.

There was something so raw and comforting about being able to just sit in the silence and be close to someone. Most people don't ever experience that, but I was so glad I could. I honestly don't know what I would do without Edward.

He put his hands behind his head, and then finally began to talk.

"She showed up that weekend you went back to visit your dad back in March. I don't know how she found where I live, or got in, for that matter, but when I came home that day, she was in my room. Naked."

I busted out laughing. I felt bad, because I knew he was being completely serious, but still. It was pretty hilarious. I would never be able to do something like that. If Edward thought I was being absurd before, I'd hate to know what he thought of that girl.

"This isn't a laughing matter, Bella. I knew there was a reason why I didn't tell you."

"No, no. I'm sorry. Please continue." I said, making myself calm down. Maybe those two shots did more damage than I thought.

"Okay, so naturally, I freaked out. But she attacked me, and I tried to resist, but – "

"Edward, you did _not _sleep with her!"

"No. I didn't. Stop interrupting or get out of my car."

"Sorry," I said.

"Anyways, so she attacked me, and it was hard to resist, but I did. I told her to eff off and never come back. But then she told me she was pregnant. And tried to claim it was mine."

"Um, that doesn't add up, compadre." As far as I knew, they had only gotten together once, too many years ago for that to work out, and my math skills weren't _that _rusty.

"I know. That's that I said. She and I dated in 11th grade for a couple months and I only slept with her once. No way she was gonna pin that on me. But anyways, that's when Alice walked in, when I was like, putting clothes on the girl and pushing her out. But, being Alice, she totally freaked and called Emmett and Jasper to come whoop my butt for it. So everyone got involved, and Emmett actually did hit me, though I think he was just being mean. But eventually we got her to leave, and I made everybody swear not to tell you about it. Apparently she hung her coat up in my closet when she got there, and I've just always thought it was yours," He sighed again, but this one sounded more like relief.

"I still don't get why you didn't want me to know." I said. I was trying to understand, but it just didn't make that much sense.

"I know. It seems really stupid now, but I did have a valid reason. You know I used to be kind of…promiscuous, I guess, in high school. But I'm not that way at all anymore, and I don't want you or any of our friends to think that. I'm such a different person from that immature little boy I used to be.

"Edward, I know that. And I'm your best friend. I need you to know that you can tell me anything. I mean that every time I say it. It's not just some cliché best friend thing with you. It's the truth. So no more secrets, okay?" I felt good about all that being resolved.

"Deal," he said, reaching for my hand. I closed mine around his, and then I knew it was my turn.

"I'm sorry I kicked you where I did. It was wrong," I said sincerely. His roaring laugh filled the car.

"Hey! If I can't laugh at you, then you can't laugh at me!" I said, smiling. Then I thought of something. "And what are you sorry for?"

"What do you mean?" He said, smiling.

"I mean, you ripped me away from a totally sexy Indian dude who was about to freaking kiss me. You suck," I said playfully.

"He wasn't good enough for you anyways," Edward said quickly, seriously.

I didn't know what to say to that. He didn't open his eyes or anything; he just sat calmly in his seat. I decided to let it go and just close my eyes and hold his hand and enjoy the rest of our night.

"Oh, my GOD, Bella! Pull your dress down. I can see _everything_!" I could hear Emmett's booming voice crystal clear through the sunroof. I quickly sat up and adjusted my dress. Edward sat up too, opening his door.

"Ha-ha, _psych!" _I heard Emmett announce, getting farther and farther away.

"Emmett, you're drunk. Go away," He said, annoyed. He then came around to my side and opened my door for me, as usual.

He walked me to my apartment, hugged me tight to him, and then kissed my forehead before telling me goodnight and walking two doors down to his apartment.

I lay in bed that night feeling completely content. I couldn't believe how well my day had ended, in spite of how horribly wrong it had been a few hours ago. Jasper was back, Alice was happy, Emmett was drunk, Rosalie was mad, and Edward and I were still best friends. Everything was completely back to normal. If only it would last that way…

* * *

**Review please!!! :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Sorry this chapter took so long!! School and my new job have kept me crazy busy!! Hope you like the change of POV. I thought this would be fun :) Read and review! Also, I had trouble with sending teasers back to people for the last chapter, but that should go better for this chapter! The song for this chapter is Flightless Bird, American Mouth by Iron and Wine. It is the song that Rose and Emmett are dancing to in the end. :) hope you like it!**

* * *

**EmmettPOV**

Rosalie sighed as she walked into our bedroom where I was stretched out watching WWE Smackdown.

"Emmett, Edward said to remind you that it's movie night, and it's your turn to pick the movie, so let everybody know what you choose."

She sounded kind of bummed out, and totally aware of what she had just unleashed. I let the excitement build in me until I was about to burst, which only took about three seconds. That's when I threw myself off of the bed and right on top of Rose.

"YES! Yes, yes, yes, yes, YES! Thank you, Rose for bringing me these wonderful news. I will notify you when I have made my decision," I said very officially, as I began pushing her towards the door.

"Wait! Emmett, I need to talk to you! Emmett!" She said as I finally got her out and then shut and locked the door. It was probably just her attempt to get me to not lock her out.

Only then did I stop to consider the fact that that probably wasn't a great idea.

"EMMETT! I KNOW you did not just kick me out of my own room!" Rosalie yelled, kicking the door to prove her point. Now I felt bad, but I wasn't backing down. I needed space to think. You see, I throw the best movie nights of anyone in our group, because I'm the only one who has _themed_ movie nights. Everybody knows that. But since there are six of us, I only get to do it once every six weeks. That majorly sucks.

"Rose, I know that was wrong, but I'll be out as soon as I can. This is a big deal, you know that," I said from the other side of the door, putting my forehead against where I figured her head would be.

"Whatever. Why can't you just pick a stupid movie like everybody else does without all the dramatic crap?" she said, punching the door right where my head was.

"OW, Rosie!" I yelled, but I think she was already gone. _Women._

Now, it was time to think. I pulled out my laptop and lay short-ways across my bed on my stomach. I had to find the perfect theme, and this was going to require the internet.

The first movie night I hosted had a western theme, where we watched Dirty Harry, and I made up this great drinking game called…well I can't remember what it was called. It didn't really catch on…

An Under the Sea theme came next, where we watched The Little Mermaid. I actually found a mermaid tail, except I was a manly merman instead of a mermaid. The girls loved that one.

The next one was a casino theme, and we watched Ocean's 13. I was dressed like a blackjack dealer, and I made everybody make ridiculous bets and then I rigged the games. _Haha._

The last one I hosted was drug-inspired, and I wore tie-die and a wig and we watched Pineapple Express. That was Jasper's favorite, I think. I personally think that's what he's been taking to make him act all stupid.

Anyways, this movie night had to be perfect. I had no clue what I was going to do yet, and it was already four o'clock! I was scrolling through theme party websites, when the perfect idea hit me like a brick.

_PROM!!!_

Prom was so awesome! I loved prom the most of all the dances I went to in high school! And we were in luck because a lot of my favorite movies have prom in them: American Pie, Napoleon Dynamite, She's All That, Prom Night…there are so many options!

I decided to check the local movie listings. There was one theater on the other side of town that showed old movies in a couple of their theaters, and maybe we would luck out. I've never hosted a movie night at the theaters! That would _really_ make my movie night perfect.

As it turns out, She's All That was playing at six thirty.

_That doesn't leave me much time…besides, that's kind of early for a movie night. But then again, I do own all of these movies, so we could have a double feature and just watch one when we get back! Great, now I just have to get everyone in their prom clothes and out the door…_

"Emmett, there had better be a _good_ reason why I'm in a freaking prom dress when it's not PROM!"

Needless to say, Bella wasn't that happy about my most recent theme night. Actually, I don't think she's been happy with _any_ of my theme nights.

_That kinda hurts..._

"Okay," I said, looking at my watch for the fifteenth time. "If we don't get a move on, we're gonna miss our movie. So let's roll. We're going in my Jeep."

I held open the door as our whole group walked out ahead of me. Just as I was about to walk out, I felt Edward grab my arm and pull me back.

"Hey man, can I talk to you for a sec?" He said, looking around as he pushed the door shut.

"Uh, yeah. Sure," I said.

_Here come the dramatics. Now we're never gonna get to see She's All That. And I'm gonna miss sitting by Rosie in her pretty dress._

"Emmett, I have stuff to tell you, but God, I don't even know where to start. It's all so mixed up, and I don't even know what's going on anymore. You know what I mean?"

_Eddie is off his rocker. All his pacing is making me nervous, too._

"Not really, bro. What's your problem? Come on, we're gonna miss the movie," I said distractedly, turning around to look at the door for the third time. That's when he grabbed my shoulder and made me face him.

"I think I'm in love with Bella." He said this absolutely one hundred percent seriously, and I'm pretty sure my jaw dropped to the floor.

"Bro," I started, grabbing his shoulder back and looking him in the eye. "That's a big deal. How long have you known this?"

He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. I could tell the poor guy had been doing that a lot. He's done that as a nervous habit ever since he was just a kiddie.

"I don't know, Emmett. I guess since I got back from New York. It's making me nervous though, because I'm pretty sure she doesn't reciprocate. What should I do? You're the only person I can talk to about this." He was seriously asking me for relationship advice. How endearing. I'm glad he finally figured out I'm the King at this stuff.

"Little brother, you just gotta put the moves on her. Feel her up a little bit tonight. Show her what she's missing out on." He made a disgusted face at me, which was surprising. He used to go for that stuff. I don't see why he's making a huge deal out of it. He knows how to flirt. I taught him well.

"I don't want to wreck our relationship though," He said, looking very depressed.

"Then I guess you'll never know. What a shame. I think you two kids are perfect together." Eddie needed to man up and take the reins. I'm glad he confided in me.

"Maybe you're right. I don't know how to handle this. Just, tell me if I'm acting like an idiot tonight please," He said, looking over my shoulder.

That would be easy. He's my little bro. I always think he's acting like an idiot.

"Sure thing. Now can we please go?" As I said that I heard the horn on my Jeep honk.

"I'm gonna KILL whoever's in my driver's seat!" I yelled, running out the door.

The first part of my theme night went perfect. The girls all looked just as corny and beautiful as you can look for prom, and all of us guys looked great in our button-ups and dress pants. We didn't have the time to rent tuxes, which made the girls very angry. Unfortunately for them, Alice the Amazing keeps things like prom dresses for all of them secretly stored in her magic closet.

_On that note, I need to remember to thank her later for that…Rosie looks HOTT._

We got lots and lots of strange looks at the theater, but it didn't bother me. I'm used to it. I enjoyed making out with Rose for half the movie. I mean, what's the point in watching that movie AGAIN, when I've already seen it like a zillion times, and I have other perfectly good things to be doing?

About halfway through the movie, I walked out to get Rose and I some snacks. As I was paying the cashier for the popcorn, I heard Jasper sigh beside me. I just ignored him, because I'm still ticked off at him. He shouldn't have left Alice like that and then gotten in a fight that I had to bail him out of.

He sighed again. Okay, now he was just looking for attention.

"What do you want, Jasper," I said as coldly as I could. I wanted him to understand that I meant business.

"Man, chill out. I just need to talk."

"Why are all my brothers turning into prissy little girls who want to talk all the time?" I asked, still not looking at him.

He just ignored me and continued.

"I know I screwed up, but Alice won't talk to me. I want to explain things to her, but ever since she sobered up that night, she won't talk to me, and I don't know what to do."

Wow, now both my brothers have come to me with their lady problems.

"I would've talked to Edward, but he's being weird lately."

"Don't worry, I gave him advice too. He should be back to normal soon." He gave me his what the eff look and then kept talking.

"I mean, it's been a week since I got back. It's time for her to chill out." This guy really doesn't have a clue when it comes to women.

"Jazz, you can't just leave her and expect everything to get better. You gotta prove to her that you're a good guy again, because to her, you're right back where you started several years ago when we were back in high school and she didn't wanna date you because she wasn't sure if she could trust you or not. So man up, and treat her good. Or I'm gonna kill you myself."

_Okay seriously, I have no clue where all that just came from but it was freaking AWESOME. I just gave the best advice EVER. Maybe I should become a shrink. _I'd _pay to listen to my advice. Heck, I'd pay just to _look_ at me…_

"ANYWAYS, as I was saying…" Jasper said loudly.

_Whoops._

I daydream a lot. Rose hates it, but I can't help it. I just have a good imagination.

"Thanks brother, I think you're right. Which is really weird, because normally I would never talk to you. About anything."

"I'm gonna pretend like that was a compliment. Now stop making me miss the movie. You probably already made me miss the part where Laney turns hot," I said, smacking him on the back of the head and then heading back into the theater.

I decided to check on Edward and Bella to see if he was making any progress. I could hardly see them since they were sitting on the other side of Alice and Jasper, but it looked like they were holding hands. Aww. Bella, who was sitting on the far end, looked completely into the movie, while Edward just looked bored and kinda depressed. _Hmm…_

Jasper, who was sitting by Edward, was trying to hold Alice's hand. She kept jerking it away, keeping that scary, icy cold look on her face. Sure, Alice was normally all perky and cheery, but that look could make your toes curl.

Then there was Rosalie, who was sitting between me and Alice.

_And I'm thinking she looks very much like she wants to make out some more…_

"Jasper just _STOP IT! _Ugh!" Alice got up and stormed past me in her bright blue party dress.

_Great. This is just what I need on my wonderful movie night._

Jasper started to get up, but that was a bad idea. I motioned to him to sit back down, and then quickly followed Alice out. Alice and I have gotten close over the years, and I really think of her as my little sister. Especially since we started college, we tend to tell each other pretty much everything. That's why I figured it would be better for me to go out and talk to her instead of Jasper.

I caught up with her and grabbed her elbow right outside the door to the theater.

"Alice, wait. Talk to me. What's goin on?" I said.

"Just leave me alone, Emmett. I just want to be alone." She sat down on a bench and wrapped her arms around herself. I walked over and sat beside her. She didn't really want to be alone. They rarely do when they say that. After a minute she laid her head on my shoulder and started crying, so I hugged her and rubbed her back, trying to soothe her. I hate when the girls cry. It makes me want to cry. And believe me; it isn't easy to make me cry.

"I just want him to love me. I just want him to feel the way I feel. I hate it that he doesn't," She said through her tears.

How could she think that Jazz doesn't love her?!

_Oh yeah, because he LEFT her again._

"Shhh. It's gonna be okay. He loves you so much. He's just not as good at relationships as I am."

She laughed humorlessly.

"I know he messed up big time this time. It will probably take a while for things to be like they were, but it will get better. You and Jazz can get through this. You just need to talk it out and realize that maybe there were some misunderstandings between you two."

"You think so?" She asked me, wiping her tears away and straightening up.

"Of course. Now can we _please_ go watch the end of this stupid movie?!"

This time she laughed and got back up. I followed her, walking once again into the dark theater. Alice calmly walked back to her seat. I watched her for a second to make sure she was okay. After a minute, she sighed, and then slowly slid her hand into Jazz's that was sitting on the armrest. Startled, he looked down at it, and then slowly relaxed into his seat, a small smile playing across his face.

Just then I felt Rosalie snake her arm through mine, and I was FINALLY able to pick up where I left off…

An hour later, we were arriving back at the apartment. I couldn't wait for the girls to go inside. I hurried them out of the car and quickly walked up the stairs. I gave Rosalie the key, and then stood back as she opened the door so I could watch their reactions.

"You have GOT to be kidding me," Bella groaned, turning and hiding her face dramatically in Edward's chest.

Jasper and Edward laughed, Alice started squealing, and Rosalie grinned as we all walked through the door. The inside of mine and Rosie's apartment was completely decked out in prom crap. From disco lights to hideous streamers, I had it all. It was by far the BEST movie night I had ever hosted.

"I HATE you, Emmett," Bella said, a vicious look on her face.

"Gah, that's scary. Tone down the evil, Bells," I said, laughing. That gave me the chills for real.

I picked Rose up and carried her to the living room, which had been arranged into a nice little dance area. Well actually, I had just moved all the furniture against the walls. Some funky dance music was playing, and I started dancing wildly, Rosalie laughed, not even trying to keep up.

I love dancing. Right now I know I'm just playing around, but in all honesty, it's a secret love of mine. Rose is the only person who knows that, though.

When a slower song hit, I grabbed Rosalie and spun her around dramatically, making her laugh. I pulled her to me quickly, and then began my serious dancing. I'm actually very good at it, and she was melting into my arms in a couple of seconds.

I love times like these. I love it when we can just be together, so carefree and happy. These are the best times. It's like in the middle of all the crap that is going on with my brothers and their girls and everything, me and Rose can still find time to just be happy together. I love her so much.

I started absently playing with the ring on her left hand, thinking of how she would look in her wedding dress whenever we got married. I think she realized what I was thinking, because she smiled and laid her head against my chest.

"I love you so much, Emmett. Thanks for this night. Everything is beautiful; even better than high school prom."

"Really?!" I said, pulling her back from me to look in at her face. That was the best compliment she could give me right now. She just shook her head, keeping the amused look on her face as she settled back into my chest and kept dancing.

"Emmett, I'm worried about the others. I know Alice still isn't speaking to Jasper, which is horrible. And don't think I haven't picked up on what's going on with Edward. Bella needs to wake up, and Edward needs to try harder before it's too late," she said after a minute of silence.

Even though we are only a few years older than the others, we are almost, _almost_, like the parents of this family. Well, maybe Rose is more than I am. I know she sees herself as the "mother hen," and she is very protective of the younger ones. I'm not surprised that she's so worried about them now.

"I've talked to all of them except for Bella about their problems over the evening, and I think they're gonna be okay. Edward was a little bit hysterical, and Jasper is his normal idiot self, but I think they're gonna take care of their stuff. They're both level headed."

"I hope you're right. I can't handle all this at one time," she said, a smile in her voice.

She sighed when the song was over, unwinding herself from my arms.

"It's too quiet. Where did everybody go?" She said, folding her hand in mine as she led me toward the kitchen.

Alice was sitting on the counter, her legs crossed in front of her and her head bent slightly downwards. Jasper was standing directly in front of her, leaning toward her so that they were almost touching. They talked in a loud whisper, obviously argueing. They were so deep in their little convo, I don't think they even heard us come in. We quickly left back out, knowing they needed their privacy to work things out.

Our bedroom door was slightly open, and we walked in to find Bella sprawled out across the bed, still looking all ticked off about the whole prom thing, flipping through channels on the TV. Edward was sitting against the headboard staring at the wall.

_I guess things didn't go like I thought they had…_

Rose moved over to the bed and lay down beside Bella.

"Edward, will you help me move the couch back, please?" I said from the doorway. I had a bazillion questions to ask him.

He sighed and then got up and followed me into the living room, shutting the bedroom door behind him. I guess he knew I just wanted to talk, because he went straight in and threw himself down on the couch I had asked him to move.

"My life is a failure. She doesn't love me. I can't do this."

"Eddie, shut up. You're being too freaking dramatic. What happened?" Between him and Jasper, I am going to go _insane_ by the end of this night.

"Nothing happened. Nothing at all."

"But I saw you holding hands. That didn't mean anything?"

"Emmett, you know we hold hands all the time. To her I'm just being my normal self. It sucks. No matter what I do, she just assumes I'm being Edward."

"Well maybe if you weren't such a flipping _flirt _all the time…" He is pretty bad about that.

"I didn't mean to flirt with her! She might as well be my sister! Ugh, that sounds so wrong. We are just close like that. That's how we are. I can't help that. They only thing I have never done is kiss her. Like, _really_ kiss her."

"Then you need to kiss her. It's not that hard of a concept, Edward." I swear, he acts smart sometimes, but he doesn't have any common sense.

"Wait, you've never kissed her at all?" I added. They've been friends since 9th grade. _Surely_ there had been some kissing in there somewhere. I mean come on. They were teenagers. And I don't know about Bella, but Edward wasn't the most innocent teenager in the world, either.

"Like I said, never a real kiss that meant anything. We kind of kissed in ninth grade one time just because neither of us had ever kissed anybody. But like I said, it meant nothing at all." He was laid out on the couch with his head propped up, looking at the ceiling while I sat in a chair behind his head.

I felt _so _much like a shrink…Stupid brothers needing to talk all the time… We are all turning in to freaking girls.

"Edward, you just have to go for it. That's the only way you'll ever know. The way I see it, you have two options as far as game plan goes. You can either kiss her for real, seriously, on the mouth, or you can just tell her how you feel. Tell her _everything_."

"Yeah, not gonna happen. She's gonna have to be the one to start all that. I can't do it."

I got up out of my chair. It had been a long night and I was too tired to deal with that.

"Goodnight Eddie. Wake me up if you decide to act like a man." I could feel him rolling his eyes at me as I walked back into my room and lay down beside Rose and Bella. They were watching the Hills, which is totally stupid in my opinion. All that show is is a bunch of winey girls complaining about their problems.

_I wonder if they accept new people to that show. Eddie and Jazz would fit in perfectly…_

After about five minutes, Rose got up to go get a drink. Bella scooted up a little bit so that she was even with me.

"Emmett," she said quietly.

"Let me guess. You are having troubles with your love life, and you too have realized the fact that I am the King of that stuff. You want my supreme advice just like Eddie, Jazz, and the short one, and you are about to unleash all your problems onto me." This is getting very old. I liked it better when nobody talked to me.

"No, I was just going to tell you that I liked it better when our theme nights didn't involve dresses. But tonight was still pretty cool."

_Oh. Whoops._

"Thanks, Bells. I'm glad you liked it," I said, letting my eyes fall closed.

"Wait, Edward has love life problems?" She sat up and looked down at me.

_Crap. Me and my stupid huge mouth…_

"Uh, nope. I was just exaggerating. Really only Alice and Jazz have love problems. Well, Edward has problems too, but we all already knew that," I said, adding the last part in to try to get her mind off the love thing.

_Edward is going to kill me._

"Okay," she said, looking at me like I was crazy. She yawned and stretched, standing up and walking toward the door. "I think I'm gonna go. It's been a long day and I'm tired. Thanks for the awesome movie night.!"

"Night, love you," I said.

"Love you too, Em." Almost as soon as she was gone, I drifted off to sleep.

A few minutes later Rose came back in. I woke up as she shut the door and started taking her dress off. I got up and helped her, and then we went to bed. I could tell she was just as exhausted as I was, since she fell asleep in a matter of minutes.

I lay there holding her, thinking about everything that was going on and wondering how these different situations were going to play out. I decided that it was time me and Rose set a date. I wanted to marry her so bad it hurt. I love the way we are now, so carefree and happy, but I can't wait till she's my wife. I can already see us in our own little house, Little Emmett's and Rosie's running around playing in the yard. It is going to be awesome.

My thoughts drifted to Jasper and Alice. I wondered what they had been fighting about in the kitchen earlier. I hoped they were fixing things. With Jasper's idiot self, though, I'm sure things are worse now than they already were.

_And what do we do about Edward and Bella? They were meant to be together. We've all known it; we've just never said anything. Apparently Bella is the only one left that can't see it. _

I decided right then and there that I was going to help Eddie in any way I could. He was quite the little player in high school, but apparently he's lost his edge in his old age.

_I'll help him get his groove back, though, even if I have to make him kiss her. _

Plans started forming in my mind as I pulled the blankets over me and Rose and drifted off to sleep.

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	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hello! So sorry it's still taking me so long to update! Work is keeping me very busy. My song for this chapter is 1980 by REHAB. haha. yes, i know that's random, but i listened to it several times while i was writing this and it applies. Sort of...**

**Anyways, read it and review it & I hope you like!!**

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**BPOV**

Things kind of went back to normal after those first couple weeks of school. We slipped easily back into our routines from the previous school year, and life continued on.

Edward and I had to get our class schedules rearranged so that all our classes were in the morning because the week after Jasper came home, the music store we both applied to called wanting us to work afternoons. We were extremely excited that we were able to work at the same place at the same time, and since we were still taking our basics, we ended up in all the same classes, too.

Alice and Jasper were continuing to work things out. It was actually a funny situation, because Alice was making him start over with her completely. He had to ask her out on a first date, on which she wouldn't kiss him, because according to her, you can't tell after one date whether men can be trusted. After that, they continued to "date" and "gain each other's trust" and "get to know each other" and all that great stuff. It was absolutely hilarious because Jasper was all love struck again, just like he was when they started dating the first time.

The day after Emmett's ridiculous prom movie night, he and Rose decided to set a date for their wedding. That's as far as they have gotten. Every time they get close to a date, one of them has a "thing" that they have to do that day or something crazy like that. I personally think they have cold feet, which is kind of sad since they are nowhere close to actually getting married.

So here we are, at the beginning of November. The leaves are changing, the air is getting crisper, and the atmosphere just feels alive. I don't know why, but for some reason this season just excites me. The coolness in the air gives me a boost of confidence, and I come out of my shell a little more than usual.

Edward and I had been working all afternoon on this particular Friday, organizing CD's and taking inventory in the back. We had already gotten in trouble twice for cutting up and making too much noise in the stockroom, so we were glad when it was finally time to leave and get the evening started.

The six of us had spent the last couple of weeks mostly apart, doing different things like studying, going on dates, and working on projects, so we all jumped at the chance to spend the evening at home catching up.

Edward drove about 97 miles an hour the whole way back to the apartments, with me nagging at him the whole time to slow down and put his seatbelt on. According to him, he is such a great driver that nothing could possibly happen to him.

When we got home at six Rose, Emmet, Jasper and Alice's cars were already there. As had been determined the night before, our little party was going to be in Edward and Jasper's apartment since they have more furniture and tend to keep their apartment the cleanest.

I told Edward I'd be over in a minute, and then ran to my apartment to grab the things I needed. I quickly packed an overnight bag with some pajama shorts, a tee shirt, my toothbrush, and my iPod. Sometimes we all end up staying the night together, and sometimes we don't. I figured I might as well be prepared. After I had everything I needed, I walked on over to Edward's.

Everyone was already busy when I walked in. Emmett was trying to push the couch to the other side of the room while Rosalie lay across it and barked out orders. Edward was in the kitchen cooking some delicious party food, and Jasper and Alice were trying to find games.

I walked into the kitchen where Edward was standing with his back to me mixing some cookie dough. He smiled when I hopped up onto the counter beside him, but he didn't look up from his cookies.

"You can't help me," he said.

That's a given. I've kind of burned a couple of his "creations" so I'm never allowed to help.

"Duh, I'm just keeping you company. So are you ready for our trip?"

"What trip?" he asked. When he said it, he glanced up quickly, bringing the spoon he was using to stir with him. Cookie dough splattered across my cheek and into my hair. For a second he looked shocked, but then his face melted into a smile.

"Edward! Thanks, now I look like crap," I said as I tried to pull the cookie dough out of my hair.

"No you don't," he replied as he reached up and wiped the dough off my cheek with his thumb. He caught my eyes for a second, and his hand lingered on my face. The same electricity flowed through me that did that day when we were watching a movie together so many weeks ago. A quizzical look crossed his face, but before I could say anything he dropped his hand and went back to stirring, just like nothing had happened.

"Now what trip are you talking about?" He asked as he stirred.

_Seriously? _

"Our trip to New York! Did you seriously forget?!" That was upsetting. I thought he was looking forward to going with me.

"Oh! No, it just slipped my mind. NO, I'm not ready. There's still three weeks until that trip."

"Slipping your mind and forgetting is the same thing. And exactly! There are _only_ three weeks! We need to be buying our trip clothes and planning our agendas and stuff! We can't wait until last minute!"

He was smirking, but he never even slowed down his stirring. And he had only looked at me once this whole conversation! That's really rude!

"You don't even care. Never mind, I'll just get Alice to go with me," I pouted.

Without dropping his smirk, he set the spoon down, turned toward me, and propped his side up against the counter.

"You have my full attention. What would you like to do in New York?"

I smiled and started going over the list in my head.

"Well, there's the Broadway show of course, and then I think we should ride a double-decker, and walk through Central Park. Oh, and could we please, please, _please_ go shopping? I mean, not like, _really_ shopping. Just window shopping. I want to _so _bad."

His eyes were dancing for some reason.

"We can do anything and everything that you can possibly fit in to the three days we will be there."

"Really? Yes! I mean, you should probably pick most of the things we do because you've been there so you know what's fun and what's a waste of money and I only wanna do the fun stuff, I mean we only have _three days_ so we have to make the best —"

"Bella, you're rambling." He was still smiling that amused smile. It was starting to get on my nerves.

"Sorry, I'm just really excited."

"I can tell," He said. He had rested his hand on my leg, and as he said that he patted it one time and then began spooning his cookies out onto the pan.

Ever since he came back from his trip, Edward has been more…affectionate. Or I maybe handsy is a better word? Not in a creepy weird way, just in an Edward way. He plays with my hair and holds my hand more than usual. It's actually really sweet. Here lately we are getting even closer than we used to be.

I would say I don't like it, but the truth is that I kind of do. It's a rush. I love the excitement in our friendship. It keeps things interesting.

We talked about our New York plans some more while we waited for the cookies to get done. Edward scooped them onto a plate and brought them into the living room with us. The group was sprawled out in a circle in the floor, despite the fact that the furniture had been arranged into a circle.

"Finally," Emmett exclaimed, jumping up and coming towards the cookies. Edward and I sat in the open space in the circle. After Emmett was done hoarding the cookies, we passed the plate around and all settled in.

"What are we doing first," Jasper asked.

"STRIP POKER!!" Emmett yelled.

"NO," Rose, Alice and I all said at the same time.

"How about Never Have I Ever?" Alice suggested.

"Nope. We are not drinking tonight, and even if we wanted to, we have nothing to drink. And that game without the drinking is Ten Fingers, which is so middle school," I said quickly. I hate drinking, and I hate that game. And together, they are even worse.

"Wrong, sista!" Emmett yelled, reaching behind the couch and pulling out a brown paper sack.

_Crap._

Emmett dispersed the drinks amongst us, and we decided that Edward would start us off.

"Never have I ever smoked a cigarette," he said, sounding bored. The game usually started out like this, with the easy questions first. Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper all tipped back their drinks.

We went around the circle we had made in the floor. Since I was sitting to Edward's left, I went next.

"Never have I ever smoked pot," I said. Edward, Alice and Emmett busted out laughing, and Jasper rolled his eyes at me.

"Really, Bella?! Again?" Jasper said. I always use that as my first one. Jasper had a very – um – dark time during high school. A one-time pot incident was one of the results, and we have never let him live it down.

He took another drink, and then made a face at me. Emmett was sitting to my left, so he was up.

"Never have I ever kissed my best friend who I was _not_ dating."

I immediately started looking around trying to figure out who it was. That's when I heard Edward sigh and pick up his glass.

_Oh…How the heck does Emmett know about that?! Or does he?_

I picked up my glass and took a drink too, and then I looked up to see three shocked faces, one smirk, and Edward looking sort of exasperated.

"Okay, it's my turn," Rosalie said quickly, breaking the silence.

I internally thanked her from the bottom of my heart. It's not like that kiss meant anything, but I didn't feel like dealing with questions right now. Alice shot me a look that told me it wasn't over.

The game continued on like this until about ten thirty. By that point, we were all buzzed enough that we decided to stop. We had, however, lost enough of our judgment to decide that truth or dare was a good idea. I don't even remember who suggested it, but it seems like that always happens.

Alice started out this time.

"Jasper, truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Really?"

"That's what I said isn't it?"

"Do you love me?" she asked.

"Yeah."

"YEAH?! That's all you've got to say?!" Alice was shrieking now.

"I answered your question, didn't I?" Jasper said.

"Well, yeah, but you're supposed to say something all romantic like, 'Yes love, with my whole heart,' or something sweet like that!" She said.

"Yes love, with my whole heart," Jasper said in a monotone voice.

"Ugh. Nevermind."

"Emmett, truth or dare," Jasper asked, rolling his eyes.

"Dare, baby."

"Lick the floor."

"Seriously, Jazz? That's so elementary. I've raised you better," Emmett said.

"Just lick the stupid floor, Emmett."

So he did. He licked the floor. I shuddered and Alice squealed.

"Bella, truth or dare," Emmett asked me.

I hate this game. Normally I would go for truth, just because I'm a chicken, but for some reason this time I decided to get dare out of the way first.

"Um, dare, I guess."

"I dare you to kiss Edward," He said calmly. I was about to refuse and ask for the consequences, but that's when I caught the icy look that Edward was giving Emmett.

_Does he not want to kiss me? What's wrong with kissing me?_

"With tongue," Emmett added in, not taking his eyes off Edward.

_Why does he have it out for me tonight?!_

I determined in my mind the second I saw Edward's acidic stare that I was going to do it. I turned around to face him, and his eyes got wide.

_Gah, this is seriously wounding my ego. He acts like I'm about to cut his finger off or something._

I looked into his eyes, trying to make sure this was okay with him. He just smirked back at me, and it was like the challenge was on. He was daring me not to do it.

I wrapped my hand around the back of his neck, and then just went for it. I pressed my lips to his so quickly that I didn't have time to talk myself out of it. After a second, I deepened the kiss, gently working my tongue into his mouth.

He inhaled sharply, and then all of a sudden he was kissing me back. At first it really surprised me and caught me off guard. I wondered if I should stop, but I was just enjoying it so much that I couldn't make myself end it. I don't have a clue how long we kissed for. All I know is that it felt electric and the part of me that was itching to break out of my shell was totally fulfilled. I broke off the kiss and sat back only when I heard Emmett's throat clear.

I immediately noticed the expressions on everybody's faces. Rosalie and Emmett were smirking. Jasper reached over and shut Alice's gaping mouth, but his was hanging open too. And I'm sure that to everyone else Edward looked just as normal as could be, but I know his face like the back of my hand, and his eyes were just as alive as my senses were. I smiled at Emmett with a look that said _HA._ Then I sat back up straight and took my turn.

"Alice, truth or dare?"

Jasper started coughing violently, Emmett started laughing so hard he was practically roaring, and Alice just kept gaping at me.

"What?!" I said. It wasn't a big deal. I don't know why they were acting like this. I mean I know they'd had more to drink than I had, but gracious. They weren't drunk or anything.

Emmett composed himself long enough to clear his throat again and say, "This game is so over."

He then jumped up and took Rose by the hand, roaring with laughter still as they walked out the door and headed to their apartment.

Alice was hitting Jasper's back, trying to get him to stop coughing still.

"Is he okay?" I asked seriously.

Alice didn't say a word. She just nodded her head. Then she gave me the secret sign for we need to talk, which was tugging on her left ear inconspicuously. We made it up in ninth grade, and still used it in emergency situations.

I pretended like I didn't see it. I don't want to answer questions tonight.

Tonight I am having fun. I'll deal with all their lame crap tomorrow.

But, Alice had other plans. She got up and grabbed my hand, practically dragging me to Edward's room and shutting the door. Then she turned around and stared at me.

"What?" I asked. She still had not said a word to me.

"Do you mind telling me what the _eff_ is going on? When did you two kiss the first time? From the looks of it, that was _not_ your first time kissing him, and I can't _believe_ you're not telling me stuff like this!"

_Yep. She's going into hysterics._

"Alice, the first time was in ninth grade, and it was because neither of us had ever kissed anyone and we wanted to get it out of the way. It meant nothing. We haven't kissed since that, until just now, and that kiss didn't mean anything either."

"The heck it didn't. I could tell."

"Tell what?!"

"It meant something. It meant a _lot_."

"Alice. It was a game. We played the game. Now it's over. Drop it."

"So you're saying that you didn't enjoy that at all?"

"Actually, I _really_ enjoyed it. I think I wanna do it again," I said, smiling.

"So you _do_ like Edward?"

"Not like you think." She is making this so much more difficult than it has to be. "But I most definitely want to kiss him again. That was fun," I said. I started taking my shirt off so I could put on my night clothes. Might as well do something productive while she's yelling at me.

"What are you _doing?!_" Alice said.

"I'm changing clothes, Alice. It's nighttime," I said, bored.

"Oh. Well, you're crazy. I'm so not getting into the middle of whatever this is."

"It's not anything!" I argued, but she was already turning to leave.

"Whatever," she said as she walked out the door.

I sighed and walked out the door myself. Jasper was following Alice out the door of the apartment. I assumed they were going back to our apartment, so I decided to stay over here with Edward.

He was smirking at me, and when I walked over to him, he laid back so that he was stretched out across the floor. I lay down going the opposite direction, so that our heads were even, but the rest of us was going in opposite directions.

I reached up beside my head and started trying to play with his hair. I figured since he plays with my hair all the time, why can't I play with his?

Since we were sitting opposite ways though, I got confused and couldn't figure out which way to run my hand, so it just kind of ended up going in circles.

Edward started laughing his melodic laugh, so I dropped my hand back down by my side.

"I think I'm a little inebriated," I said after a minute. I hadn't really even thought about it until a second ago.

"I think you are, too," he said, with laughter still in his voice.

"How did Emmett know about the thing in ninth grade?" I asked. That was strange.

"It sort of came up the other day. He's an idiot. I don't know why he brought it up."

"No, it's okay. Doesn't matter. Didn't mean anything," I said. I was so tired I could barely complete my sentences.

"Nope, not a thing," He said. He turned his head on its side to look at me, and I did the same. Looking into his eyes, I decided I wanted to try something. I slowly moved my head closer to his, stopping every few seconds to search his eyes and make sure he was okay with this. He turned completely serious, never breaking our stare.

Then we were kissing again. It wasn't a long, deep kiss like the first one – it was only a few seconds – but it was enough to make that wonderful electricity run through me again.

_A best friend who's a great kisser…AND hot...I'm not blind, I've just never thought about it much...that is very awesome..._

"Okay, it's time for bed," Edward said as soon as I ended the kiss, jumping up and walking into his room. I got up and followed him, automatically getting the blankets out of the closet to make myself a cot on the floor.

"Bella, don't be absurd. Get in the bed."

"It's fine. I've slept on the floor before."

"Just get in the bed." We were both really tired, so I didn't fight him anymore. I got in the bed. He turned off the light and pulled off his t-shirt before climbing in beside me. He pulled the covers up around us, and I snuggled up to him, burrowing my face into his chest. It was cold, and he smelled so good. He always does.

As Edward started humming my song, I thought about everything that had happened in the past few hours.

What was this thing with me and Edward? It didn't feel like a romantic relationship; it still felt like our same old friendship. Who can honestly say that they can have such a great relationship like this with their best friend without it being weird?

I mean really, there was zero weirdness just now. It was just Bella and Edward, as usual. This was taking our friendship to a whole new level, and I liked the way it was going.

*****************************************************************************************************************************************

**EPOV**

I stuck my face in Bella's hair and inhaled deeply. It smelled just as wonderful as it always does. There was no way I was sleeping any time soon. Too much had happened tonight.

First was the thing in the kitchen. I had just barely been able to keep myself off of her when I splattered cookie dough all over her. And then she just kissed me, so comfortably and freely? How did that even happen? It didn't even matter that it didn't mean the same thing to her that it did to me. I was one huge step closer.

And even after that, there was the kiss in the floor when we were alone. That let me know that she wanted to do it again and I was happy to oblige. If this was where our friendship was going to go, I definitely wasn't going to argue.

I put my arm around her and pulled her a little closer. It only took a few minutes for her even breathing to sing me to sleep.

* * *

**So did you like it? Please let me know!!! Reviews=teasers!! Thanks to everyone who already reviews!!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I have like 40 bucks worth of debt from buying Sonic slushies every day, but I do not have any rights to Twilight :( how sad.**

**A/N: Hello! once again I am so sorry for the delay and also the lack of a teaser. You guys don't even understand how crazy things have been lately. I wish the days were like 30 hours long. And that I didn't have to sleep for at least 6 of those hours. And that I could spend like 10 of those hours writing or reading or doing SOMETHING that I actually want to do. Anyways, enough of my ranting. Here you go!**

**BTW, the song for this chapter is Make You Feel My Love by Adele. Yes, I am fully aware of how freakign random my taste in music is. The song for the chapter just depends on what kind of mood I'm in. Anyways go listen to it while you read this chapter to really understand how Edwrad is feeling! Trust me, it sets the scene, especially through the last half of the chapter.**

**EPOV**

The next couple of weeks went by slowly. Bella and I didn't kiss in front of our friends again since they took it badly. We really didn't kiss much at all; I think it was more than anything just the fact of knowing that we could if we wanted to. It made us closer; maybe not as close as I would like to be, but we were definitely closer.

Don't get me wrong; I was well aware of the fact that we were playing with fire. This had the potential to end extremely badly for myself, if not for the both of us. I was putting everything I held on to on the line to be with her like this.

Usually we kept it light and playful. It had only turned heated one time a few days ago.

*flashback*

_Bella and I had come home from work to empty apartments. We went to her and Alice's and ordered a pizza before we crashed on the couch to watch a movie. About 10 minutes into it, I just couldn't focus at all. I was extremely aware of her laying there beside me, and I needed to feel her lips on mine. She was all dressed up today, with the makeup and everything and she looked amazing._

_I turned my head towards her. After a minute she turned and locked eyes with me, and then we were kissing. _

_She's the one that deepened the kiss, but after our normal several seconds, I'm the one who didn't stop. I couldn't. This might be "just kissing" to her, but it was a lot more to me and I had no control over it. _

_I rolled us over and snaked my hand down to her waist, kissing her even deeper. My hand started drifting upward, and she started breathing harder. She showed no signs of stopping me, so I kept going. _

_Just before my hand got to her chest, the doorbell rang._

_Since I was otherwise distracted, it scared the crap out of me. I jumped up and fixed my shirt – apparently the 'feeling up" had been two-sided – and ran to the door, trying to get myself together. _

_I quickly paid for the pizza and walked back into the living room, where she was sitting up fixing her lipstick. I was overwhelmingly relieved. I had been terrified that things would be weird after…that._

"_What kind of pizza did we get?" she asked casually._

"_Pepperoni," I said, smiling and walking back over to the couch._

We've been more careful since then. We have something resembling unspoken rules about this by now – only kiss when we're by ourselves, don't kiss when we're lying down, and don't kiss more than once a day. They were pretty simple rules to follow.

Now I am in my apartment with Jasper and Emmett getting ready to go to some party with the girls. Alice and Rosalie had been talking about it for weeks, and there was no way we were getting out of it. Even Bella had gotten excited about it, which was very rare.

It was getting very cold outside, being the middle of November, so we dressed warmly and headed over to Alice and Bella's apartment, where the girls were getting ready.

They came out of Alice's room all in a pile.

"Hurry up, Alice! We're gonna be late!" Rosalie said, pulling Alice along.

"Bella just needs a little more eye shadow! I'm almost done!"

"No, I don't. I look fine. Let me go!" With that, Bella yanked her arm away from Alice, which started a ridiculous chain reaction.

Because Bella was wearing three inch heels for some odd reason, the force of her pull knocked her over, which caused Alice to fall back into the bedroom. Since Rose was holding onto Alice, she fell on top of the other two. Emmett tried to jump in and catch Rosalie, and ended up right in the middle of the pile.

Of course, Jasper and I found the whole incident wildly funny.

Everyone surprisingly got up unharmed and still looking decent. Alice had to brush her hair again and Rosalie got up adjusting her dress, but they were all generally okay.

We decided to take separate vehicles – each one of the guys driving. I asked Bella where we were going exactly, and I was slightly shocked to find it was the same frat house I had been talked into entering last time.

"Bella, _please_ tell me you are kidding," I said as I put the car in drive. I now knew _exactly_ why she was excited about this party and it had absolutely nothing to do with the actual party.

_That stupid Indian idiot._

"Nope. This is supposed to be the biggest party of the year. I heard they even hired Boys Like Girls to come play! Why would we _not_ wanna go?"

"Maybe because last time we went, You and Alice were like, drunk, and dancing with some immature frat guys, Emmett and Jasper got in a fight, and you and I argued for most of the evening. It doesn't exactly make this place seem like fun, you know?"

"Just try to forget it and have fun, okay? For me?" She pleaded. She was turned all the way around in her seat to face me. "And we weren't drunk by the way. We knew exacty what we were doing."

I sighed and glanced over at her lovely smirking face. She looked stunning tonight. She was wearing a deep red party dress and her hair had been curled into the most perfect waves I had ever seen.

"Fine, I'll try to have a good time," I said, a smile coming to my face. "You look nice, by the way."

"Thanks, you do too."

She reached across the car and grabbed my hand, just like I had grabbed hers in the theater several weeks ago. Usually I'm the one that holds her hand, not the other way around, but I'm sure she still saw it as another friendship thing

_Just like she sees everything that happens between us as a friendship thing._

We arrived at the frat house a moment later. This time I went around and opened her door for her, and we walked in together. There was no way I was letting her out of my sight tonight.

The party was already in full swing when we got there. As Bella said, Boys Like Girls had taken up residence in the front room. I didn't realize so many people could fit into one house. I kept Bella close as I weaved us through the crowds, trying to find the others.

"It's hot in here! I'm gonna go get a water!" Bella yelled over the noise.

I wanted to stay with her, but I decided that it would be more practical for me to find Emmett and Jasper and everybody while she got water. We both have cell phones. I'll call her and tell her where we are.

She pushed her way further into the crowd, heading toward the back of the room where drinks were being served. Surprisingly, these parties were pretty high end as far as college frat parties go.

I went the opposite direction from Bella, continuing to look for Emmett. I found him in the far corner of the room standing with Rose, Jazz, and Alice. I sent a quick text to Bella telling her where we were. After that I turned around to face the band and at least attempt to enjoy the evening, as I had promised Bella.

About thirty minutes later, the band took a break and a deejay took over. That's when I took the time to realize that Bella wasn't with us anymore. In fact, I couldn't remember her coming back at all.

"Alice, where's Bella?" I said as I turned around.

"Haven't seen her. I figured you knew," she said before turning back to her conversation.

"Hey, there she is," Emmett said, tapping my shoulder.

I looked to where his finger was pointing, and I saw her alright. She was about twenty feet away, in the middle of the dance floor, dancing with none other than Jacob Black.

_This cannot be happening again…_

His hands were all over her, and they were dancing entirely too close. I was immediately infuriated. I stepped out toward them to go give that guy a piece of my mind, when I felt a big hand grasp my shoulder.

"Don't," Emmett said in my ear. "Let her dance. If you are wanting to stay inconspicuous or whatever the heck you're trying to do, then you need to not get crazy jealous right now. Go get a drink, and I'll mess the punk up if he gets too handsy."

With that, he let go of my shoulder and turned around to pull Rosalie out to the dance floor. Once I was sure that they were close enough to Bella to keep an eye on her, I turned around and sighed in relief. Emmett's little speech gave me time to cool down, and I realized immediately how stupid messing the kid up on impulse would have been.

I tried to take my mind off the fact that Bella was dancing with somebody else and instead hung out with Alice and Jasper for a few minutes. However, I hated being a fifth wheel, so that didn't last for very long.

I grew impatient.

Just when I turned around to go get Bella, I saw Emmett approaching, shoving Jacob along with him.

"He grabbed the butt, and then he went for the chest. There was a line I was watching for, and he crossed it. Actually, he jumped on over it and just kept on skipping."

I gave him a look that said _shut up._ Sometimes he gets a little carried away with his analogies. I sighed and followed Emmett out of the club, Jasper not far behind.

_This is seriously wrecking my night. There is no way I'm going to be able to "try and have fun" now._

When we got outside, I turned to face the guy.

"I really, _really _don't want to have to hit you, man. Because I never hit anybody, and that would just royally screw up my night, and my night's already bad as it is. So please just leave her alone."

"Why? Seemed to me like she was enjoying herself," He said, grinning.

So I hit him. Hard. In the jaw. I couldn't help it, really. He violated my best friend. That was uncalled for.

Jasper and Emmett just stood there with their mouths hanging open. They apparently didn't think I was really gonna hit him. I guess they don't realize how freaking serious I am about this stuff. I mean, if some guy felt up _their_ girls, I would expect them to clock the jerk.

_Right, she's not my girlfriend. That's why it surprised them._

_Well it shouldn't,_ I told myself. They should know that I would go just as far for her as they would for their girlfriends.

After threatening Jacob again and letting Emmett scare him, we went back inside. The girls were all still in the same corner, and they looked mad. As soon as we approached, Bella turned around and hit Emmett in the arm as hard as she could. Of course he didn't even flinch.

"What was that for?" Emmett asked.

"Why did you do that? Every time I try to dance with him, one of you animals freaking picks me up and carries me away! What is you three's problem?!" She was yelling at all of us now, not just Emmett.

"I never picked you up," Jasper interjected.

"SHUT UP!" Bella, Emmett and I yelled. I think all three of us were a little on edge.

"He was touching your butt! I thought you needed help," Emmett said. That's when Alice jumped in.

"Bella here is a very gorgeous, very single WOMAN! Let the girl have some freaking fun! If she wants to let some hot frat guy feel her up, that's her choice! Both of you butt out!" It had been a while since I'd seen the wrath of the Pixie. I had forgotten how screechy and scary she could be.

With that, all three girls walked away.

I ran my hand through my hair and blew all the air out of my lungs.

"What do we do now?! I didn't even want to come to this stupid party, and now you two have made the girls go away. This sucks," Jasper said.

"Shut up," Emmett and I yelled at him again. He rolled his eyes and walked away too.

We stood there awkwardly for a minute before I broke the silence.

"Yeah, so I guess I'm gonna go find Bella."

"Um, yeah. I'm gonna go find Rose," he said, scratching the back of his neck. Neither of us can accept criticism well, and it was making us both uncomfortable. We still stood there for another awkward moment before we walked in opposite directions.

I found Bella sitting be herself in a chair toward the front of the room. She looked extremely lonely, so I went and sat by her.

"You look lonely," I said. She still didn't turn to look at me.

"Look, don't be mad at Emmett. I was gonna tear the guy up and he told me not to, that he would keep an eye on him. But then a few minutes later he towed him off the dance floor, and then I hit him, and now you're – "

"You did what?" She yelled angrily.

_I guess I forgot to tell her about the hitting part._

"Edward, you are _not _my father. You have _got_ to get that in your head! I love you, but I can protect myself!" She was upset. Not just mad, upset. And I could think of absolutely no reason why she would be. I decided it was time to bring in the groveling.

_I hate doing this..._

"I am so sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I absolutely know that you are completely capable of taking care of yourself, and I can't believe I overreacted like that. Forgive me?" I hate apologizing to her because she always takes advantage of it and throws it back in my face later. However, sometimes it's necessary.

With that, I turned on the "Edward charm," as Bella calls it. She was melting in seconds. She tried so hard to mask the smile threatening to creep onto her face, but it didn't work. I grinned too, and then she started laughing.

"Edward Cullen, did you just _apologize_ to me? The Great, Perfect Edward Anthony Cullen stooped down low enough to apologize to me? This deserves celebration! I think you have to dance with me now!" She said, smiling widely.

_And who was I to deprive a girl of her wishes?_

I smirked at her and then took her hand, leading her out onto the floor.

Bella and I love dancing; she is surprisingly good at it considering her clumsiness. When I didn't have a girlfriend in high school, Bella was always my dance date. Actually, she was my date for pretty much every dance, since my girlfriends tended to be The Flavor of the Month. I get a lot of crap from her about that too.

There were so many people on the floor that our bodies were instantly meshed together. All I could see was Bella. Her hair was curled perfectly, flowing halfway down her back. It moved constantly as she danced. Her perfect curves felt so right with mine, and I never wanted to let her go.

I resisted the urge to kiss her for as long as I possibly could, but I didn't want to wreck the moment. We were dancing so closely together that it wasn't hard. I just leaned down and gently kissed her right below her ear.

I heard her slight intake of breath, and then she danced even closer.

* * *

**AlicePOV**

"I don't like this one bit," I said to Rose, chewing on my bottom lip.

We had been looking for all the others from our seats against one of the side walls of the room, and I had found Edward and Bella, alright.

I found them just in time to see him assaulting her neck; I also saw her reaction to it, and it scared me.

I haven't forgotten about Bella's "feelings" right after Edward came back from New York. Even if she did shrug them off, I could tell they were there. Being her best girlfriend, I was so worried that he didn't reciprocate, and that she was putting herself out there for nothing.

That thought had worried me ever since she told me how she felt, but I never thought I really had _reason_ to worry until now. What I had just seen scared me. I mean, I'm sure none of us have forgotten the whole truth or dare kiss a couple weeks ago, because that was pretty shocking. But had this been going on ever since? And what is "this" if they're not dating?

That's the part that scared me. He was a player in high school. I haven't forgotten. He had a new chick with him every time I turned around. If he was just screwing with her head, he was gonna have me to deal with. And I'm sure by now he _knows_ that screwing with me is not a good idea. I will make him hate himself if he hurts her.

"Do _you_ know what that was all about?" Rose asked me.

I filled her in really quick, and we decided it was time to go. We called our boyfriends, and then I walked straight out onto the dance floor and stood on my tiptoes to get Edward by the ear and drag him out of there.

"Ah! Ow! Alice, let go," he whined all the way out the door.

When I had him by himself, I let go and turned around to face him.

"I don't know _what_ you two are trying to do, but I saw that little neck-mauling thing you were doing. I just want you to know that if you screw her over, you WILL regret it, Edward Anthony Cullen. I swear if you so much as make her cry ONCE, so help me, I will make you hate your –"

"Alice! It was not a "maul" or whatever you just called it! It was more of a, well, like a peck, I guess. What is wrong with you? You know I would never hurt her." He said, still holding his ear like it hurt.

_Good. I hope he can't sleep tonight because it hurts so badly._

"How are you not hurting her in the long run by sucking face with her all the time? Or neck. Or whatever it is you two do," I said, giving him the "ew" face.

He grimaced like he didn't think I knew about that.

"You think I haven't thought about that? She's the one who started all this! I'm the last person on the earth who wants to screw this up! I'm in freaking _love_ with her for Pete's sakes!"

As soon as he said it, his head snapped up. His eyes were wide, like he couldn't believe he'd just said it. I'm sure I looked about as shocked as he did, because to be honest I was floored.

_That changes things._

I felt a smile creep up my face. I couldn't help it. I think a small part of my subconscious brain had been hoping for this the whole time, but I didn't think it would really happen. I was so happy; I could hear freaking wedding bells.

"Edward, look me in the face and say that again. Mean it," I pled. I was hoping so very much that he really did mean it.

"Alice, I'm not saying it again. I can't believe I said it out loud in the first place," He whined, slumping down until he was sitting on the steps. "She doesn't even feel the same way. If I'm hurting anybody, I'm hurting myself."

He looked so utterly depressed that I couldn't help but to try to cheer him up. I sat down beside him and put his head on my shoulder. He didn't say anything, but I gave him time. We are actually pretty close, contrary to popular belief.

"I think she's using me," He said after a minute. He sounded so serious that I couldn't help but laugh.

"Alice, it's not funny! I'm screwing myself over. I would freaking jump through fire to show her how I feel and she just makes out with me and then leaves all the time like it's nothing to her! I can't keep doing this!"

"Edward, look at me. You're not screwing yourself over. I'm pretty sure she actually feels the same way."

"Really" He asked, raising an eyebrow. He was actually skeptical about this for some reason.

_Which is the problem, considering I'm not totally sure of her feelings…_

"Well she may not know it yet, but keep trying! She does have some kind of feelings for you! Trust me as her best girlfriend. Bella would not be making out with someone that she wasn't at lease a little interested in. She doesn't do that. Plus, you know I have a sixth sense about this stuff."

He just laughed darkly. I think he seriously doesn't believe that he's got enough game to get the girl! That's just crazy.

"Well stop sitting here and moping about it. Go dance with her or whatever. Just please take it easy on the physical stuff. Don't start something that's gonna end your friendship in the long run, Edward. We would all hate to see that. Believe me, we all want to see you two together, and I'll do everything I can to help you."

"Besides telling her, right? You can't just tell her. That's for me to do," He said.

"Yes. I will leave that for you. But who says I can't …encourage?" I said, a grin stretching across my face.

He just sighed and rolled his eyes at me. I guess he knows how um, _strong_ my encouraging can be. I wiggled my fingers at him as he walked back into the house. He sarcastically grinned and finger-waved back to me as he went through the door.

_Now for the scheming…How do I get Young Bella here to see the light….._

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**A/N: So did you like? or did you not? :( please! let me know. I seriously will get you a teaser this time if you review. :)**


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